The Life in the Balance
by LMRaven
Summary: Brennan places herself in a precarious situation while trying to save Booth. Set in season 7.
1. Chapter 1

A/N - So I started writing this one over the summer and had planned on posting it before the new season began but I was writing another story and wanted to concentrate on that first. I'm not even sure this is worthy of a posting but I figured why not? If reviews are positive enough, I'll continue.

This story takes place in season 7 towards the end of Brennan's third trimester.

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><p>Dr. Temperance Brennan drummed out a nervous beat on the wheel of her car as she waited for Andrew Hacker to pick up the phone. She scowled when the light turned green and he still hadn't answered. Her cerulean blue eyes focused not only on the task of driving but on what lay ahead. Pressing down hard on the gas pedal, her Prius lurched forward, steadily picking up speed on the near deserted stretch of road.<p>

"Hacker." The gruff voice of the man she had once dated came over the earpiece of her blue tooth.

_Finally_, Brennan voiced in her head as she concentrated on the road in front of her.

"Write down this address quickly." She didn't bother with her usual salutations and just rattled off the address without any further preamble. There was no room…no _time_ for the subsequent interrogation she was sure was going to ensue. Hacker didn't like to be told what to do. He relished being the man in charge. Not this time, she thought. This time he had no choice.

"Temperance? Is that you? What's going on?" Andrew asked with a flustered tone to his voice.

"I don't have much time to explain. Did you write it down?" Could he be any more predictable? Did he not realize the urgency in her request especially considering it was a tone she rarely used? How he could have at one time proclaimed to know her…really know her was beyond understanding. There was only one person that truly knew her and he was in danger right now.

"Yes, yes. I got it." He said pulling the pen from behind his ear and quickly scrambled for a blank piece of paper on his disorganized desk. His fingers tensed on the pen as he wrote. " Now what am I supposed to do with it?"

Satisfied that he did indeed take down the information; she could hear his paper rustling in the background. "I need you to send a team of agents there. Now this is important." She spoke slowly as if giving instructions to a child. She swore she could hear his teeth grinding together. "The agents cannot be seen at the house. They must be discreet. It's in a heavily secluded wooded area. They should be able to sneak up without being seen. Carson has Booth." She finished with her voice breaking just a little.

"Jesus." Andrew raked his hand through his thinning hair. "How do you know? Wait…where are you?" He asked suspiciously, his eyes narrowing to slits. She could almost visualize his brows drawn together as he asked the question.

"On my way there."

"Oh no. You need to turn around and get your pregnant butt back to the Jeffersonian. Right. The. Fuck. Now." Hacker was panicking. "This is not your call Temperance. Technically you're not even an agent. You have no business going there."

Normally, Temperance would bristle at his less than respectful tone but she didn't have the time. No, she wasn't an agent but she had certainly solved enough of their cases. But she knew his anger was in direct result of worry for her.

"He called me! " She shouted making her ear bud crackle. It was the first time she allowed herself to show her fear filled rage. "_Me_. Specifically." Brennan added toning her voice down. "So don't tell me whose business it is. Carson wants the evidence we acquired against him and he wants me to deliver it…_alone_. If I don't, he's going to kill Booth."

"Damn it Temperance. Think about the baby."

"I _am_ thinking about the baby." She snapped back. And she was. She also was thinking about Parker. There was no way she could let her child be born without a father…no way she could face Booth's little boy if she failed…no way she could live with herself knowing she could've prevented Booth's death and did nothing to stop it. She wasn't impervious anymore…but because of Booth's love for her and the child she carried and her own for him, she was still strong. If she lost him…no…she was not going to think like that. She wouldn't be able to function if she did.

"This is highly against protocol." He sighed in resignation knowing nothing he said would stop her. "And a complete disregard to the regulations we have. We do not negotiate with criminals!"

She wanted to tell him to go fuck his protocol. "Listen Andrew...I didn't tell you so you could talk me out of it. I'm telling you so you can provide sufficient back up. Are we clear?"

It would be a waste of time to argue with her, he knew that well. The only thing he could do was ensure that she was as safe as possible. Booth was going to kill him. Hacker clenched his jaw. "Yeah...we're clear."

"Good." Brennan took the Bluetooth out of her ear and threw it down on the seat next to her. She could feel the baby kick in her womb, responding to the adrenaline and cortisol being released into her bloodstream from stress.

"It's okay, baby girl. Mommy's going to make everything okay." She said rubbing her abdomen in a comforting gesture. She used to scoff at mothers-to-be for talking to their unborn fetus' knowing that it would only hear a cacophony of muffled nonsense but since she became pregnant that had all changed. She found the gesture oddly reassuring now and it gave her a small semblance of peace knowing that just maybe the baby would recognize the tenor of her voice when she was finally ready to greet the world.

She was ten minutes away from her destination and there was one more thing she had to do. Reaching into the console next to the driver's seat, she pulled out her mini recorder and hit record. "Booth, I'm so very sorry…"

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><p>Brennan braked the car in front of the abandoned shack of a house, surprised that this place had a known physical address at all. Dust clouds from the wheels of her braking tires surrounded her vehicle making it hard to see the front of the building. Booth's SUV was parked at a haphazard angle near the door and not for the first time, she bit back a sound of despair. Why hadn't he brought someone with him? What was he thinking coming here by himself? He was thinking it was a routine questioning, she thought answering herself. Carson was barely on the suspect list up until that point. When they got out of this, they were going to have a serious talk about his unnecessary risk taking.<p>

She reached behind her into the back seat and pulled the heavy Kevlar vest to her. It had belonged to an overweight FBI agent that had retired from the force and Booth being overly protective of her and their baby procured it for her. At the time she had scoffed, stating since she would only make necessary trips into the field and only to examine bodies she wouldn't need it. Booth being Booth had insisted however and now she was glad she had held on to it.

Shoving her arms into the sleeves with purpose, Brennan went to secure the front and encountered a dilemma. It wouldn't fit around her. She had grown much larger, now at over eight months pregnant and the vest wouldn't close properly. If she started from the bottom, the top wouldn't close and if she started from the top, the bottom wouldn't close. For her there was no choice to make. Maternal instincts prevailed and she fastened the bottom of the vest.

She slipped on her Burberry trench coat over it, hoping to conceal the fact that she was wearing a vest at all. In one pocket was the evidence Carson wanted; a partially damaged thumb drive. Angela already had been trying to reconstruct it before Brennan swiped it without her best friend's knowledge; an act she hoped Angela would forgive her for. In her other pocket, she felt the heavy weight of her handgun. She never used it before. She didn't count the numerous times she spent at the target range to improve her skill. Clicking the safety off, she lumbered out of the car hating the fact that because of her size her movements were limited. Her martial arts training would not help her today.

The first thing she became aware of was the ominous silence that lingered and stalled over the area. With the exception of her car's humming engine, not even the sound of a wild bird's call could be detected and what was more important, she could not hear Booth. She knew him…knew he would not remain quiet if he was able to speak. That alone caused terror for him to worm it's way through her. Brennan caught her self from stumbling under the weight of her worry and righted herself. She would use this terror as strength…would not allow it to debilitate her. The fate of her family depended on that.

Fifteen minutes and the cavalry should be here. In the broad span of the universe, it was not a significant amount of time…nothing more than a pin drop in the cosmos but in this context it could've very well been an eternity.

The front door creaked open slowly barely a fraction and the black nuzzle of a gun poked through the small opening. It was all the invitation she was likely to get. Holding her hands up in a surrendering gesture, she stepped forward until she was about fifty feet from the doorway.

"I knew you'd come." The disembodied voice called out gleefully to her.

"You did not give me much choice." She answered back, glad her voice was steady and did not project the fear she felt creep into her spine.

"Did you bring it?" He didn't have to say what "it" was. She already knew.

"I did." She confirmed with a nod.

"Show it to me."

She still could not see his face but the threat of the gun he waved at her was clear. "Where's Booth?"

"He's indisposed at the moment." He said with a chuckle at his own joke. "Now be a good little scientist and show me what you have or the two of you will die…or should I say the three of you." She could feel his eyes on her womb and suppressed a shudder.

Brennan audibly sucked in a breath at the warning and deliberately slow and calculated, she reached one hand into her pocket and took out the thumb drive and held it up to show him. He opened the door wider. She could see his face now. Carson was an ordinary man; average by all standards except for one – he was a brutal killer.

"Good. Now throw it over."

"I want to see Booth first. That was the deal." She said placing the small gadget in the same pocket as the gun.

"You should know better than to make a deal with a murderer, Doctor Brennan…or didn't they teach that to you at the F.B.I."

"I don't work for the F.B.I." She informed him tersely trying to stall him until her back up came. "I work for the Jeffersonian Institute. Now where's Booth? You will get nothing until I see him." Somehow she managed to keep the tremors from her voice. If there was any time she needed to compartmentalize it was now. The problem was; since being more secure in her relationship with Booth…since getting pregnant, her compartments were considerably smaller.

"Since I'm feeling a little generous today…" Carson opened the door wider and Brennan could just barely make out Booth's crumpled form on the floor. His head was turned away from them but she could clearly see his hands and feet were bound. That was good, Brennan let out a sigh of relief. If he was tied up, it meant that he was still alive. Why would Carson restrain a dead man? He was injured though, that much was obvious. She wished she knew how much.

"What did you do to him?" Brennan demanded, tempering the fear that was about to clog her throat.

Carson shrugged. "Nothing that some heavy duty painkillers won't cure…unless you don't give me what I want. Now Dr. Brennan, the evidence, if you please."

He trained his gun on her steadily. She knew he had watched which pocket she had put the drive back in, which was why she put it in the same pocket that had her gun. The only problem was, if she pulled out the gun he would shoot either her or Booth. Could she shoot him through the pocket of her coat? She had to try…even if she only disabled him. She could do this.

Her fingers closed around the trigger slowly as she made it seem like she was fumbling in her pocket. Suddenly his expression changed into anger and she knew without a doubt he was aware that she was armed. She was out of time.

Two simultaneous gunshots fired echoing into the thick woods surrounding them. Two bodies simultaneously hit the earth with a thud and somewhere in the distance was the blare of a siren.

As Brennan struggled to hold onto consciousness and her vision began to blur and darken, an old bedtime prayer came to mind.

_Now I lay me down to sleep_

_I pray the lord my soul to keep_

_If I die before I wake_

_I pray the Lord my soul to take_

The irony wasn't lost on her that she was an atheist. A small smile flitted on her lips that were starting to lose their pink color. She could feel the blood seeping from her chest. At least her baby would be safe…she could hold on a little while longer for the baby.


	2. Chapter 2

Upon hearing the gunshots, all thoughts of a covert attack were effectively squelched and on Hacker's command, the sirens went on. He was glad he had the forethought to have the EMT's follow their federal convoy. He hoped it was Carson that went down but with two gunshots, he was unsure of whom, if anyone went down with him.

Before the vehicle came to a complete stop, Hacker and another agent jumped out and took off in a run. Carson was scrambling to his knees, half crawling to Brennan's running vehicle as he clutched his bleeding side. An agent ran towards him efficiently stopping his progress by planting his knee into his back. With a grunt, Carson collapsed face down into the dirt.

"Don't even think about it scumbag!" The agent hissed into his ear and grabbed Carson's hands, yanking them roughly behind his back so he could cuff him.

A few yards from him, Hacker spotted a sight that would haunt his nightmares for a long time to come.

He ran towards her…half stumbling until he was down on his knees beside side her. Blood was everywhere. He ripped open the front of her trench coat and saw what Brennan had done with the vest. Uttering an oath that was somewhere between a prayer and a curse he applied pressure to her wound where the blood was chugging slowly out in the rhythm of her decreasing heartbeat.

"God Damnit, Brennan! _Why?_"

Brennan coughed quietly, blood bubbled from her mouth. "You know why." She whispered almost inaudibly. Using what was left of her strength, she tugged urgently on his sleeve. "Booth, get Booth."

Hacker gave a cursory glance over his shoulder, afraid if he looked away from her for too long, the light would completely fade from her eyes. "They're getting him now Temperance. He's still unconscious but he's alive. Looks a damn sight better than you do too." His eyes darted over her worriedly.

"Not supposed to make fun of a pregnant woman's looks." She tried to laugh but groaned in pain instead. Tears leaked from the corners of her eyes falling swiftly to the ground beside her.

"You hold on, Temperance. That's a direct order from the F.B.I." He demanded. He could see the light beginning to fade from her eyes and it caused tears to burn in his.

"Don't work for…the F.B.I." She tried to smile. "Tell them..." she licked her dry lips trying to wet them with what was left of the moisture in her mouth. The effect was eerie since it wasn't saliva that wet her lips, it was blood. "…Tell them to…save…save my baby."

"You can tell them yourself." Hacker told her hoping she would be too angry at him to die. "Where is that ambulance?" He shouted desperately over his shoulder.

"Right here sir." An agent called out to him. Right behind him were the EMT's rushing over to them with a stretcher.

"You'll be okay Temperance. You _have_ to be. Booth will kill me for sure if it turns out otherwise." He whispered to her but she had already slipped into unconsciousness.

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><p>Dr. Camille Saroyan was buried elbow deep in forensic medical files from the current murder investigation and wanted to do nothing more than toss them in the garbage pail and go home. She wished her forensic anthropologist had not chosen today to take the afternoon off. Granted, Brennan had worked tirelessly through her first trimester with only minimal disruptions for morning sickness and had not yet taken a day off with the brief exception of a well-deserved and needed week off, early on in her pregnancy. So when Dr. Brennan had pleaded with her for the afternoon off, Cam didn't have the heart to refuse. Even if they were in the middle of a highly publicized triple homicide investigation.<p>

If the tone in Brennan's voice was any indication, the woman would have taken the time anyway and only now did Cam silently wonder about the desperate tone in her voice. It wasn't medically related to the pregnancy; that much she was sure of.

The incessant ringing of the phone broke Cam away from her thoughts. She swiped her hair from her eyes and dug under the pile of paperwork for her phone; accidentally knocking some of those papers on the floor.

"Crap." She muttered as she impatiently picked up the receiver. "Dr. Saroyan."

"Dr. Saroyan, it's Assistant Director Andrew Hacker." Hacker announced frantically into the phone.

Cam rolled her eyes. Great, she needed to hear from him like she needed another hole in her head. Didn't he realize that she and her team were working as fast as they can on this? Shit trickles down, Cam mused. If Hacker was getting heat from above, it meant they all would feel it.

"Listen Hacker, we're working as…"

"I didn't call about the case…well I did…but not in the way that you mean." He interrupted her. His voice then lowered an octave. "There's been an incident."

The hairs on the back of Cam's neck stood and rose to attention. "An incident." She repeated; her voice flat. The definition of "an incident" in Hacker speak ran a broad spectrum as far as Cam was concerned. It could be anything from an insignificant leak to the press to an all out breach of national security. "What _kind_ of incident?" She asked slowly, dreading the answer.

"The shooting kind." He answered bluntly.

Cam took all of two seconds to digest this information. She knew Hacker would only bother to tell her about a shooting if it involved someone she knew…someone she cared about…someone like Booth. He was the only one besides Dr. Brennan that wasn't accounted for…well technically Brennan was off…doing whatever…probably designing a nursery with an anthropology theme or something like that.

"Booth?" Her voice cracked as she voiced her assumption out loud. "Is he okay? Did you call Dr. Brennan? Does she know?"

"Booth is okay…or at least he _will_ be…that's what the doctors tell me. He's still unconscious." He paused momentarily and Cam could hear him swallow thickly. She felt trepidation over his next words creep further into her spine. "However, it wasn't Booth that was shot. It was Dr. Brennan."

Her mind went blank. No. That couldn't be right. Dr. Brennan was safe…_at home_…enjoying a half day off.

_"WHAT?_" She screamed when she found her voice then lowered it abruptly not wanting prying ears to overhear her. "Would you mind telling me what the hell my _very_ pregnant forensic anthropologist was doing in the field, Hacker?" She ran a hand through her perfectly coiffed hair. "No forget that. Just tell me if she's alright?" The line remained silent but she could hear Hacker's heavy breathing. 'God damnit, Hacker, is she _alright_?"

"We don't know." His tone was laced with regret.

Cam closed her eyes in silent prayer and sat down trying to keep calm enough for the next question. "The baby?" She whispered with the barest hint of a chin quiver trying her best to reign in her emotions.

"We don't know." He said again. He just sounded frustrated this time. "Just get your squints and come to GW University. Hopefully, we'll know more by then. I'll explain the who's what's, where's and why's when you arrive." He said before disconnecting.

"Oh God, Oh God, Oh God." Cam repeated over and over as she fought to fill her hands…her mind with some mundane activity. She found herself on the floor, picking up the papers that dropped, trying to put them in order and failing. She had to tell Angela and Hodgins the news. Damn Hacker for placing that duty on her. No, she thought as she squared her shoulders. They were her people. It was her responsibility.

She looked up from her position on the floor and saw Hodgins walk briskly past her office; like he was trying to avoid her.

"Hodgins!" She called out, scrambling to her feet and chasing after him.

He came to a halt and pivoted around to her with a defensive expression on his face. "I'm still examining the particulates. These things take time."

Angela came running up next with a nervous expression marring her features. She couldn't possibly know, Cam thought.

"Cam, we have a problem…the thumb drive…" Angela started.

"Wait" Cam held out her hand in a signal for them to stop speaking.

It wasn't until that moment that the couple looked at each other in silent recognition that something was very wrong. Cam looked frayed…nervous. In the years of knowing her...working by her side Angela could only count on one hand the number of times she'd seen her in such a state and none of the reasons were ever good.

"Cam? Sweetie? Is something wrong? Is it Michele?" Angela asked putting a comforting hand on her friends arm.

Cam shook her head. "No" Her voice croaked with the threat of unshed tears. "It's Dr. Brennan."

Angela paled. "What about Brennan? She's at home. Isn't she? Tell me the baby's not coming early. That's it, isn't it?"

"Then what are we waiting for?" Hodgins said excitedly. "Let's go. Baby Bones is coming." He was already walking swiftly towards the exit.

"Hodgins, wait!" Cam shouted after him. She hated to be the one to shatter his illusion of joy. "Dr. Brennan..." her voice squeaked when he turned around with a questioning look in his blue eyes. "…Dr Brennan's been shot."

* * *

><p>"Can't this thing go any faster?" Angela shouted nervously at her husband who was currently navigating their new kid friendly SUV through the streets of DC like a New York City cab driver.<p>

"You're the one that wanted this_ "thing"_ because of Michael." Jack answered, his voice on the border of panicked and hysterical, as he switched lanes. A car beeped loudly at them. "Can't you see we're in a rush here?" He shouted into the rearview mirror at the white BMW he just cut in front of.

Angela buried her face in her hands and let out a sob. "Oh God Jack, what are we doing to ourselves." She took a quivering breath and shook her head. "You're right...I know..." She inhaled and exhaled quick breaths like she was back in Lamaze class. "You're going as fast as you can."

Jack grabbed his wife's hand and gave it a squeeze. "Hey...Dr. B...she's strong. We _know_ that. Hold onto that, okay."

Angela nodded silently as the tears continued to stream down her face. "They overcame so much to be together...it's hard to think that it will end like this."

"It won't, okay?" Hodgins was trying to convince himself of that as much as he was trying to convince his wife. Brennan was one of the strongest people he had ever had the privilege to meet and call his friend. He found that out after being buried underground with her. But being buried in a car was a lot different than a gunshot wound...a helluva lot different.

Angela sniffed, wiping at her nose with a baby wipe she grabbed from the glove compartment. "Brennan's tough." She nodded sporadically. "She's a fighter. The baby too." She cast a glance to the back seat where their now empty baby seat was. The toys attached to it swaying with the swift movements of the car.

"That's my girl. Keep thinking like that."

"Do you think Cam knew more than she was saying?"

"No." He may be a conspiracy theorist but he didn't think Cam would do that to them. If she knew, she would have said something.

Cam met them in the parking lot, after taking her own vehicle and the three of them raced through the hospital doors to see Hacker furiously issuing orders to a few F.B.I. agents that were milling around. Cam immediately felt sick when she saw that the front of Hackers shirt was covered in blood. She worked with bloodied bodies all the time; granted they were dead but she was used to it. This was different. This was her friend's blood.

"Oh God." Angela had spotted the blood too. Hodgins reacted immediately to steady his wife; grasping her upper arms to keep her from crumpling to the floor.

Hacker raised his head and locked eyes with Cam and nodded solemnly. She felt like the cowardly lion going to see the Wizard of Oz as they approached him slowly.

"What happened?" She asked flatly, not bothering with any greeting.

"It was Carson." He met her gaze unflinchingly. "That thumb drive that was confiscated from the last crime scene..." he glanced at Angela. "Well, it must have had proof of his guilt on it and he wanted it. When Booth went to question him again, he must have blindsided him and rendered him unconscious. He called Dr. Brennan demanding the drive in exchange for Booth's life. She called me. We argued. _Damn it_...I _told_ her not to do it."

"But she did anyway." Cam said understanding instinctively how the forensic anthropologist would react.. Brennan was one of the most bull headed people she knew, especially if she felt she was right or someone she loved was in danger.

"Yeah." Hacker nodded, scrubbing his hand over his face. He felt old...tired. "She called me to back her up...meet her at the scene. After that...well...We were there...we were right_ the fuck_ there...just a few minutes away when I heard the shots. When we got to the scene, she had already shot Carson and Temperance..._God_...so much blood...there was so much damn _blood_...she was covered in it." He shook his head and looked away from the squints' inquisitive glares. "She had a vest but it wasn't big enough...ya know."

"Hacker, where are you going with this?" Cam urged when she noticed he wasn't exactly in the present but reliving the scenario in his mind.

"Tempe only covered up her abdomen but the bullet..._dear God_...the bullet struck her in the chest."

Angela let out a keening cry and turned away from them, not sure if she wanted to hear the rest.

"Is she...?" Hodgins managed to croak out past the lump in his throat.

"She's still in surgery. It's not looking good at this point. They already lost her twice. Stubborn woman came back though." He added in tone full of admiration.

"The baby?" Angela whispered brokenly.

"That is perhaps the only good news in this." He smiled woodenly. "Baby girl Booth was delivered by emergency C section. Five pounds, 2 ounces. She is in NICU but everything looks good. She was only a few weeks early."

"And Booth?" Cam asked.

"He's still unconscious. Not only was he knocked out...we found a wooden bat at the scene but it looks like Carson shot him up with a sedative as well. He shouldn't be out for too much longer, I hope."

An uneasy silence washed over them. Booth would need to be told. It was only a question of who would be the one to do it.

"I'll do it." Cam said answering the unasked question surprising everyone. "I've known him the longest and frankly Hacker, you have her blood all over your shirt." She looked at Angela and Jack and sighed. "And Ange, I'm sorry but the state you're in right now, I don't think you'd be able to get through it."

"What about me?" Jack offered. He didn't want to but he was a guy...he could relate to Booth's situation.

Cam placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder and blinked back tears. "Take care of Angela. I'm going to see if I can find out anything before I go into Booth."


	3. Chapter 3

The first thing Booth became aware of was the aching throb in his head. The second thing he noticed were his eyelids were extremely heavy..._too_ heavy. Something didn't feel right and he needed to find out what that was right now. He fought to pry his eyes open and blinked furiously to bring the room into focus...felt a wave of disorientation at the bright florescent lights hovering over his head and the antiseptic smell that invaded his nostrils. Was he in the hospital?

He tried to recall something..._anything_ as he stared upward at the generic white ceiling. He had been going to interview Dwight Carson. Something was hinky about him. That much he did remember. Booth assumed his gut instincts were right if being in a hospital was any confirmation. When he felt comfortable that the room wouldn't spin if he turned his head, he slowly surveyed the room biting back a groan of pain. Disappointment washed over him when he saw Cam in the room and not Bones. Bones should be here, shouldn't she?

Cam stood at the window staring at her own reflection as she watched the rain glide down her mirror image in the glass. She heard the rustle of bed sheets behind her and knew Booth had woken up. Mentally bracing herself for the conversation she was in no way prepared to have, she turned around trying to inconspicuously swipe at the stray tear that formed in her eye.

"You're awake." She announced with a false smile that immediately caused the hairs on the back of Booth's neck to rise and stand at attention.

Booth glanced around the room and brought his hand up to his head, probing at the gauze bandage that was there.

"How long have I been out?" He winced as he tried to pull himself to a sitting position.

"A few hours we think."

Booth relaxed a little. Okay, that would explain why Bones wasn't there. She must be in the cafeteria getting something to eat. Yeah, that made sense. She had gotten to eating every couple of hours since she entered her third trimester.

"Carson?" He asked, his mind going back to the last thing he could recall.

In a perfect world, Cam wouldn't have to tell him that the criminal had come through surgery with flying colors and was now recovering a few floors above them with guards posted outside his door while the love of Booth's life was fighting for her own life. But it wasn't a perfect world; the number of innocent victims that had she had picked apart in her autopsy suite was a testament to that.

"Shot and arrested. He'll be housed by the government as soon as the doctor's discharge him." She was careful not to let on where exactly he was located.

Now that was news. "I don't remember shooting..." How could he have shot someone and not remembered it?

"You didn't."

He felt relief. "Then who?" Who else knew he was going there? And if someone did know, how would they know there was imminent danger. Carson had only been a person of interest, not a suspect.

Cam was suddenly uncomfortable, invisibly squirming under his direct gaze. She really should wait to tell him the devastating news until a doctor checked him out, she reasoned. What if he really wasn't as alright as they thought he would be. He may still need another MRi, now that he was conscious.

"I'm...I'm just going to let the doctor know you're awake." She motioned to the door nervously as she backed up towards it. "He'll want to examine you."

Booth nodded still feeing disoriented, Cam's stilted speech going unnoticed. "Oh, Cam. Can you let Bones know to bring me up some vanilla custard before she leaves the cafeteria? She's probably already getting some for me but I just want to make sure."

For some reason, unbeknownst to Booth, this seemed to upset Cam. Her eyes looked really watery right before she nodded and walked out the door. Was he in worse shape than he thought? His head did hurt like a mother but it was probably just a concussion. He should know...he'd had quite a few of them.

He was still contemplating Cam's odd behavior when the doctor walked in five minutes later asking his routine questions and checking his eyes with a light scope. Cam hovered in the doorway biting her lip. Physically, she knew he would be okay. When she had spoken to the doctor she had told him that Booth wasn't aware of the news yet and wanted him to be checked out before she said anything. He had agreed with her.

The doctor gave her a silent nod, signaling that Booth was in as good as condition as any to hear the news.

"Well doc...what's the scoop?" Booth asked the stern looking man trying to lighten the too somber atmosphere with some humor.

"Aside from a mild concussion, you're just fine." He only offered a slight smile that didn't reach his eyes. "No lingering side effects from the sedative but we want to keep you overnight for observation just in case." He said before strolling out of the room.

"Figures." Booth mumbled and turned to Cam who approached him slowly. "Don't let Bones stay the night, please. She'll be stubborn and insist on staying but..."

"Seeley" She interrupted him with a sympathetic look on her face. Now she had his full attention. She never used his first name...well rarely ever and never in that tone unless something was very wrong.

"What? They don't have any more vanilla? Tell Bones chocolate will be fine." It wasn't his favorite but it would do in a pinch.

"Dr. Brennan isn't in the cafeteria."

Booth sat up, a feeling something akin to panic, his eyes darting back and forth as his brain tried to function. "Where is she then?" it suddenly dawned on him; Cam's odd behavior, her teary eyes and he knew or at least he thought he did. "She heard didn't she...and it caused...Dear God...it caused her to go into early labor. It's_ too_ soon Camille!" He punched the mattress with his fist. "Where is she? What room? Take me there now." He demanded as he swung his legs over the side of the bed with every intention of going to Bones. "She wasn't supposed to go through this without me. She needs me."

Cam couldn't help it, her thin veneer of calm cracked. She bit her lip to hold back a broken sob and furiously shook her head at the same time. She had been worried about Angela but she couldn't even do this.

"Seeley. Stop." She demanded trying to regain her composure and gripped his hands tightly with her own; her knuckles turning white with her steel grip. Her eyes locked on his. "She's in the hospital, yes, but not because she went into labor." Clearing her throat she continued. "Carson...he wanted the usb drive we had...the USB Drive that had evidence that would put him away for a long, long time. Of course, we had no idea at the time. He called Dr. Brennan" Cam closed her eyes summoning the words and with them, the strength. "...he called her wanting the that file in exchange for your life."

Booths face paled to a chalky white...he could actually feel the blood leave his face. "Tell me she didn't." He pinched the bridge of his nose fighting hysteria. "Please Camille, tell me she didn't." He pleaded defeatedly because deep down he knew the truth...knew her and what she would have done. In slow motion, he could feel that other shoe drop...the one he had been waiting for ever since he and Bones finally had their moment and got on the track they had derailed from so many years ago.

"I'm sorry Booth. I wish I could." How she wished she could.

"What happened?" He asked hoarsely; his throat working furiously against the strangling feeling, trying to shake off the forewarning of impending doom...the kind that would rip his whole world apart and make no apologies. "Damn it! What the fuck happened!" Booth stood straight up, ignoring his body's protests and gripped the bed sheets for support.

Cam didn't even flinch at his outburst. She expected this...expected it would get much worse too. "I'm not one hundred percent sure." She swallowed thickly. "Dr. Brennan...she called Hacker to meet her there. But by the time he got there..." She faltered in her explanation, her chin quivering trying to hold it together. "...by the time he got there...shots had already been fired."

Booth brought his hands up to his ears. He couldn't listen anymore. "No! No, no, no, no, NO!" He shook his head furiously uncaring about the pain there, only feeing the pain that was wrapping around his heart...squeezing until he had to gasp for air. He was shaking...falling apart at the seams, tears slipping unchecked down his cheeks. He barely noticed them. Only the need to hear what came next kept Booth from completely fracturing.

"She's alive, Seeley." She said placing her hands to his shoulders, giving them a slight shake. Cam fought to assure him in some small way, though it made little difference at this point. "She's in surgery, but still alive as far as we know. Booth, do you hear me she's _alive_." She kept repeating it hoping it would break through his angst ridden mind. She wasn't about to tell him that it was still touch and go. "And you...you have a beautiful baby girl." Cam told him the only good news she could. "I've seen her. She's small but she's perfect."

"How?" He choked on a sob almost unwilling to trust this one piece of good news.

"Emergency C section. Dr. Brennan, she wore her vest...used it to cover her stomach. Your baby is just fine." She assured him.

"Where did the bullet hit?" Booth's voice was low...deadly...a cobra ready to strike. His skin suddenly felt too tight...his heart pounded furiously in his chest sending the vibrating pulses throughout his body. He counted each one waiting as he stared deadlocked with Cam, for her answer.

"Booth, I'm _so, so_ sorry." She shook her head back and forth hated that she was being verbally forced to say it. Just a few tears escaped her eyes. She was unable to hold them back anymore.

Booth wished she would stop apologizing and just tell him. "Where, Camille?" The question came out again...this time through clenched teeth. It was the only thing that was keeping him from roaring like an animal in pain. Booth knew the size of the vest he'd given her a few months back, knew it wouldn't fit now. If she used it to protect their baby, that left a lot of her exposed…too many places where a fatal shot could hit it's target.

"In the chest." She said hanging her head, wiping at her cheeks with the backs of her trembling hands.

Booth couldn't think straight. Rage, grief, terror...they were all descending on him at once and he felt buried under the weight...he needed to claw his way out. No, he needed to go back to sleep and wake up again to world where Bones was safe and whole again...where this was all just a terrifying nightmare.

"Is he still alive?" They both knew who he was talking about.

Cam nodded mutely.

"I'll kill him. Where is he?" Booth raged.

"I won't tell you that." She gripped his shoulders tightly. "Not now…not when you're like this."

An unnatural stillness overcame him. The one person he wanted to exact revenge on, he couldn't get to right at this moment. That left one other person on which he needed to vent his anger.

"HACKER!" He shouted fighting against the waves of dizziness and ran from the room barefoot. Cam scrambled after him, calling his name desperately, willing him to stop.

Booth stopped to a halt when he spotted his superior. Upon hearing his name being shouted by his grieving agent, he looked up at the man like a deer caught in the headlights.

Why was Hacker wearing red? The irrational thought came from nowhere. He never wore any color that wasn't standard F.B.I. issue, Booth thought. It wasn't until he edged slowly closer with death in his eyes that he realized it wasn't a red shirt at all. The dark reddish brown splotches that covered his shirt was blood...Bones' blood.

Cam caught up to him just as Booth lost his balance and vomited all over the floor. To heavy for her to hold up, Booth sunk to his knees sobbing as Cam held onto him.

"A little help here, please." Cam shouted to anyone that would listen. It was Hacker that took a tentative step forward. "Not you." She halted him. "I told you to change your damn shirt."

With one hand, Booth wiped the spittle from his lips and used his other hand to push himself to a crouching position. "I'm fine, I'm fine" He insisted waving Cam away, still glaring at Hacker who stood there motionless, his hands laying defeatedly at his sides.

Gripping him under the arm, Cam helped Booth the rest of the way to his feet and reluctantly let go of him when he tried to shrug out of her grasp. Side stepping the evidence of his sick stomach on the floor, he lunged at Hacker. Grabbing him at his shirt collar, he pushed him against the wall. To Hacker's credit and everyone's amazement, Hacker didn't put up a fight.

"How could you let this happen? Why didn't you stop it?" Booth screamed in desperation and rammed his boss against the wall. The other agents, woken from their initial shock, sprung into action, pulling Booth off of Hacker. Booth tried to struggle from their grasp, shouting out obscenities. "If she...if she..._dies_...it's on you." He panted and pointed vehemently at Hacker, who had the good sense to not move.

It was Cam that stepped in between them. "Booth, as much as I think Hacker is an ass, he's not at fault here."

"Thank you, Dr. Saroyan." Hacker said straightening his tie.

"You...you just _shut up_." Cam gave him a look of disgust before turning back to Booth. "You know as well as I do that Dr. Brennan is a fighter...especially when it comes to you. Just...just keep it together, okay." She gave him a wobbly smile. "She's going to need you."

Booth hung his head, all fight leaving him now. The agents that had grabbed him, slowly let him go. Not wanting to face him or his grief, they turned away.

It was this scene that Hodgins and Angela came upon on their way back from the NICU unit.

"Oh God, please don't tell me..." Angela broke off, covering her mouth and burying her head in her husband's shoulder.

"She's still in surgery." Cam reassured her automatically deducting where Angela's thoughts had went. "But Booth now knows."

Angela walked over to Booth and wrapped him in a giant hug. Feeling like a lifeline had been thrown to him, he let Angela embrace him, her hands stoking his hair in a maternal manner as he sobbed into her shoulder. She hated seeing the usually strong agent like this...so broken...so un-Booth like.

"Now you listen to me, Special Agent Studly." She said whispering encouragingly into his hair. "She's going to be fine. Okay? We have to believe that."

Angela felt him nod into her shoulder but she knew his heart wasn't in it. "Would you like to meet your baby girl?" She needed to distract him from trying to get to Carson.

Booth pulled back from her, his red rimmed eyes brimming with a little hope. "Is she...is she really okay?"

"Oh, sweetie. She's perfect." Angela smoothed his hair comfortingly, "She has your thick brown hair and although all babies are born with blue eyes...I swear they are the exact same color as Bren's"

Booth choked on that piece of information and pressed his palms to his eyes. Bones' eyes. It was what he had hoped for.

"Would you like me to come with you, big guy?" Cam asked him, soothing her hand down his arm. Too overwhelmed with conflicting emotions to speak, he nodded, shoulders slumped. "Okay but first let's get some clothes on you."

Booth looked down at himself, not even realizing or caring that he had attacked Hacker in his hospital gown. As Cam turned to lead him down the hall, Hacker called out to him.

"Booth...I really am sorry." It was an empty, belated apology and they all knew it.

Acknowledging the apology with a single nod, he followed Cam towards the elevator bank. No one would refute the fact that Booth was as broken as anyone had ever seen him.

* * *

><p>Upon learning about the unfortunate event leading up to her birth, Baby Girl Booth quickly became the darling of the nurses in the NICU unit. So it was of no surprise to any of them that that feeling extended towards the broken shell of a man who walked in, freshly washed and cocooned in scrubs, asking to see his little girl. Cam, who was not a family member by blood, waited outside watching them though the glass.<p>

"She's so little." Booth observed as he watched his and Bones precious little miracle through the casing of the incubator.

"She's strong though." One of the nurses on duty told him with affection in her voice. "Her cry is as loud as an infant twice her size."

"She get's that from her mother." Booth said unable to stop the catch in his voice. "How long will she have to stay in the incubator." He wanted to hold his little girl...his only link to the woman he loved so much.

"If all goes well, another day but she'll still have to remain in NICU for a little while after that. She is remarkably healthy for a preemie. You can reach in through those holes in the side if you want. Babies love human contact. Especially from their daddies." The nurse winked at him.

This made Booth smile bittersweetly. He missed this part with his son...this feeling of awe and at a new life; a life that he and Bones created, born from their love. Tentatively he reached in, letting his fingers trace lightly against his daughter's downy skin. Sensing him, she turned her head towards the glass and opened her eyes and stared unblinkingly at him, a mirror of an expression he often seen on Bones. His breath caught in his throat. Angela was right. The eyes were unmistakably Bones. It was what he had hoped for since he found out she was pregnant. And even though, he knew his little girl saw him as a giant blur, he felt like she could see him very clearly. Wise eyes, he thought.

"Does she have a name?" The nurse asked.

"Lauren. Lauren Joy Booth." Booth answered her proudly. It was the name he and Bones had decided on ever since they learned of the sex all those months ago. The name was for Lauren Eames, the surgeon that Bones had identified with so much with that she nearly died working the case. It was that case that was the initial catalyst to bringing them together finally and they both wanted to pay homage to the woman that no one had known gone missing in the first place. Through their daughter, Lauren Eames would always be remembered. And of course, Joy, a memoriam for the child that Bones had been so many years ago and a childhood she had lost so suddenly.

"That's a beautiful name." The nurse told him as she typed out the name and the number on the infant's ID tag. The printer printed out a new name sheet and the nurse replaced the tag that said Baby Girl Booth with the new one; Lauren Joy Booth.

"I bet you can't wait to meet your mommy." Booth whispered to his little girl. She grabbed his finger in her tiny little hand and he was almost brought to his knees again. "She can't wait to meet you either and I know she's going to get better real soon so she can come and visit."

"Your mom, well, she is one of the most beautiful, most stubborn people I have ever met and I love her so much just as I love you so much. I'm so glad that you're finally here, Lauren Joy Booth."

Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted Sweets outside the glass whispering something into Cam's ear. Her eyes shot to his and back to Booth nervously. Hating Sweets in that second for destroying the first time he had seen his daughter, he closed his eyes in silent prayer. There was news and as much as he wanted to find out, he dreaded hearing the worst.

It felt like he was being torn in too many pieces and all he could do was remain stagnant...unmoving for fear he would shatter and fragment. He wanted to find out what news Sweets came bearing but looking into his nervous eyes, he dreaded it at the same time. He wanted to stay here and cocoon himself with his little girl...not let anyone in until he was certain to hear something good.

The birth of his daughter should have been one of the best days of his life but it quickly nose-dived into one of nightmares...the kind that would wake him up in the middle of the night drenched in a cold sweat. This was real. There would be no waking up from this.

In the end the decision was taken from his hands.

"She'll be fine here. She's sleeping. Go find out about mom." A nurse said kindly to him with a reassuring smile and a comforting pat on the back. He nodded once and shed the scrubs, tossing them into a bin reserved for used garments and opened the NICU door to await his fate.

Sweets gave him a sympathetic look and wrapped him in a guy hug. Booth stood there stiffly with his hands remaining at his sides. He prayed Sweets would steer clear of any shrinky mumbo jumbo talk because frankly, he might just pop him one in the jaw.

Sweets pulled away from the unreturned hug and straightened his suit jacket and tie. Hodgins had actually been the one to call him and tell him the news. Without a second thought to the patient that awaited his attention in his waiting room he fled out of the Hoover Building disobeying all sorts of traffic laws as he raced to the hospital. His friends needed him...correction...his family needed him.

Now that he was face to face with Booth, he regretted his decision to be the one to come to the NICU unit and relay the news he heard from upstairs. Booth looked empty, as if all the life was drained out of him. He had heard about the near fiasco when Booth had blindsided Hacker. He wasn't surprised by this fact and was glad that Hacker decided against writing his top agent up for the act. A quiet testament to Hacker's own feelings of guilt.

"I came as soon as I heard." Sweets told him, his voice low and somber with no hint to the youthful pep he always seemed to have.

Booth wasn't concerned with niceties. He gave no thought to how he should thank Sweets for his show of support. He only wanted the one thing that Sweets had that he didn't - information.

"Have you heard anything?" He asked hoarsely.

"I only know she's out of surgery. Since you are her medical proxy, the doctors won't say anything about her condition unless it's directed to you."

Booth heaved a heavy sigh and nodded in defeat. "Let's go then."


	4. Chapter 4

Booth tried to understand what the surgeon was telling him, he _really_ did...but he couldn't. Every time the man opened his mouth to throw out some medical terminology, he felt dizzy...sterile white walls closed in on him making him want to claw at his throat, gasping for breath.

What did he know of thoracotomies and half a dozen other words that the doctor spewed from his mouth with ease? If it weren't for his ability to read Cam's facial features, he would be completely lost.

The explanation was exhausting as much as it was heartbreaking to hear. Booth was starting to pick up on a few words here and there through an endless echoing tunnel...extensive tissue damage, lacerations to the lung and heart organs, severe blood loss.

"Just tell me if she's going to be alright." Booth demanded cutting the doctor off from his long winded diatribe. That's all he wanted to know. C'mon give me something good to cling to, Booth thought silently as his body tensed for impact. He felt Cam squeeze his arm in silent support but he shook her off.

The doctor; John Warren, who was the top of his field, heaved a sigh and shook is head. "The truth, Agent Booth, is we did everything we could up to this point. Dr. Brennan has proven in the OR, that she is a fighter so let's hope she keeps on fighting. As I mentioned, there was severe damage done to not only her lungs but there was some damage to her heart from the way the bullet fractured. The good news is she is stabilized. We have placed her in a medically induced coma to allow her body to heal but the risk for infection is very high and right now she is not breathing on her own."

Booth took a hard swallow trying to digest the information and couldn't. "So you're telling me that she still could die."

"We're doing everything we can to make sure that doesn't happen."

It was a crap answer meant to instill hope and Booth was tempted to tell that to the doctor. "It doesn't change the facts though."

"No, no I'm afraid it doesn't."

"I need to see her." It wasn't a question. It was a demand. Nothing and no one was going to stop him from seeing Bones for himself.

"Of course." Dr. Warren nodded. "She has been moved to ICU. I know that there are many people that wish to see her but I want to remind you only two persons are allowed in at one time. We have other patients to think about as well."

Booth nodded in understanding before he walked off down the hall, not caring if anyone followed him. His feet automatically carried him to his destination, his mind barely processing where he was going. It wasn't until he was a few feet from the door to her room that he slowed his pace, suddenly not as anxious to enter the room. He was afraid if what he would see.

All around him, he could hear the sounds of machines…of quiet sobs…gasps of pain. The smell of antiseptic and impending death permeated his nostrils causing his stomach to roll. This was ICU. There was no intimation of privacy here, just glass encased cubicles left open...always open should the need for immediate assistance be required. He tasted the bile on his tongue and forced it back down. Bracing his shoulders, he willed himself to take the few steps left.

Booth gripped the glass doorway to her room tightly as his knees threatened to give out on him. She looked like she was caught in a web of wires, IV's and tubing. He remembered the doctor mentioning something about intubation though it barely registered at the time. To actually see the tube taped to her mouth…hear the gentle whoosh of the machine followed by a slight rise and fall in Bone's chest served as a bitter reminder that she was teetering on the very brink of life and death.

He edged closer to the bed noting how the auburn fan of her eyelashes contrasted starkly to the near translucent pallor of her pale skin. Her abdomen was only slightly distended now that their child was born.

"Oh, Bones." He managed to verbalize brokenly through the thick lump in his throat.

Booth pulled a chair as close to her as possible; his knees pressing against the bed frame. Sitting down, he grasped her small, cold hand careful not to disturb the network of wires and bent over to rest his cheek on the smoothness of her cool skin. A solitary tear escaped his eyes and trailed down his cheek to fall onto her finger.

"I want to be angry at you…I _really_ do." He whispered against her hand. "But I also want to wrap my arms around you and never let you go. I love you so much Bones…_so damn much_." He kissed her hand, gripping tighter, feeling his tears fall more freely now. "Please, remember your promise. you can't leave me…you can't _ever_ leave me."

His only answer was the steady beeping on the heart monitors and the air escaping from the tubing down her throat. They were sounds that should have invoked comfort that she was alive. They didn't. Instead they instilled a deep-seated terror that the odds were going to finally beat them. They had conquered them time and time again, although neither of them had come out completely unscathed; a brain tumor, a stab wound, a gunshot wound and the subsequent faked death, being buried alive or stuck in an explosive freighter hold by the gravedigger, a year apart, a boyfriend that wanted to sail her away with him, a girlfriend that should never have been. Entrenched in Booth's mind, he knew what all gamblers inherently knew; the house always wins and he felt like the house was finally collecting.

Booth didn't know how long he sat in that position, comforting himself with the slow but steady feel of her pulse under his gently caressing fingertips. He wasn't aware of the pleas and words of love that spilled from his mouth; sometimes reverently, other times bitterly. He was only aware of the silence that greeted him in return. He told her of Lauren; their beautiful little girl…the little girl that would and did need her mommy, well and whole again in the hopes it would elicit a more speedy recovery. He joked with her about what he imagined she would say about all this…about him speaking to her when she clearly could not respond. She would tell him he was being illogical in that forthright scientific manner of hers. But he knew…had faith that she could hear every word.

"She used to speak to you too…when you were in a coma a few years ago." Angela said from the doorway. She had been watching them tearfully for a few minutes now and her heart broke for them both.

Booth looked up swiftly wiping the tears from his cheeks, realizing this was the second time his usually spot on sniper instincts failed him today. The first was when Carson had gotten the drop on him and now with Angela standing in the doorway, leaning on the frame for support as she watched him at his most vulnerable.

"What do you mean?" He asked her gruffly, clearing his throat.

"Everyday you were in that damn coma, she sat with you...reading to you from this story she was writing for you. She would even take her meals in your room...however few and far in between they were. No one could tear her from your side without risk of bodily harm." She said with a small laugh as she walked further in the room. Leaning over Brennan, she smoothed her friend's bangs with a light touch. "Just so you know, she wouldn't think you were being illogical."

"Thank you Ange." He whispered.

"You would almost think she was sleeping." Angela's voice broke. "She's going to be fine, G-man. Just wait and see."

"Why Angela?" He asked because he needed to know...needed insight from one of her closest friends. "Why would she take a risk like that?"

Angela straightened thinking carefully on the answer. "Booth, let me ask you something." She started, absently chewing on her fingernail. "What would you have done...if the situation was reversed?"

Booth scowled and looked away. "It's not the same thing."

"Yes. Yes, it is Sweetie. It's _exactly_ the same thing." Angela seemed to lose herself in her own thoughts then. "I can't help thinking that if I could have just...if I could've just repaired the damage to the flash drive faster...this whole thing would never have happened."

"You don't know that."

"I know." She offered him a sad smile. "Just like you didn't know that Carson was anymore than a person of interest." At his disbelieving look, she continued. "I _know_ you Booth. I know you're blaming yourself for this. Don't, okay? The sole guilt rest squarely on that bastard's shoulders."

Engulfed with his own guilt, Booth neither corrected her nor did he agree with her. Regardless who should bear the burden, it didn't change the facts and the facts were Bones was lying here in a hospital bed, barely alive and his beautiful newborn baby girl may never get a chance to meet her mother.

"Could you do me a favor?" He asked her trying to focus on something...anything else.

"Anything. You know that."

"Yeah, yeah I do." He pinched the bridge of his nose as he sat back down. "Can you sit here with Bones? I have to call Max and Russ. My cell phone is still in my room."

Angela walked over to him and squeezed his hand tightly. "Of course, Booth. You don't even have to ask."

"Thanks. You're the best."

"I know." She offered him a small smile before he pushed himself up again and walked out the door.

Sighing, Angela sat down on the chair that Booth recently vacated and looked at her friend.

"That man loves you so much sweetie. And your daughter? Well, just so you know, she's going to be a little heartbreaker." She let out a chuckle that sounded more like a sob. "I know you would tell me that it is physically impossible for someone to break a heart but trust me on this one, sweetie, you and Booth are going to have your hands full with the boys lining up at your door. It'll be okay though, I have grand plans for her and little Michael already. Now don't argue with me." She told the unresponsive Brennan. "I have a gift for knowing these things. After all, I knew about you and Booth after all way before you did."

* * *

><p>When Booth got back to his room, his cell phone was buzzing like a chainsaw. Scrubbing his face with his hand, he plunked himself on the lumpy mattress and retrieved the phone from the table next to the bed.<p>

After staring blindly at it for a few seconds, he hit the accept call button."Booth." He answered tiredly, pinching the bridge of his nose not even bothering to check the caller ID on the phone.

"Okay Cherie, you better start talking and start talking fast. Tell me what in the blazes is going on. Why am I in the empty lab of the biggest workaholics I know in the middle of a work day, while we're are trying to catch a murderer no less, and Mr. Bray, the only one here that can possibly give me any information is looking at me like he's rather donate a kidney than talk to me?"

Booth pressed his palm to his eye hoping to scrub out the image of his Bones lying there pale and lifeless with machines breathing for her. The horrifying vision; a permanently inked tattoo burned into his retinas. He felt himself gasping, trying to keep the harsh sobs at bay. Pull it together, Booth, he commanded himself.

"Agent Booth!" Caroline barked in his ear pulling him back to earth. "Unless someone is dead, dying or in the hospital..."

"Someone is." He managed to push out of his mouth, nearly choking on the words.

Caroline pulled the phone away from her ear and gave it a confused looked. That was certainly not the answer she expected. Tapping on the hearing end she put the phone back to her ear. "Something must be wrong with our connection. I thought I heard you say..."

"I did."

"Do you want to run that by me again?"

Booth's breath came out in a whoosh as his chest restricted painfully. "It's Bones." His voice refused to cooperate and explain further.

"She's in labor isn't she?" Caroline said with a sigh of relief not even thinking that if the squint doctor really was in labor the last place Booth would be is on the phone with her. "Well she may feel like she's dying and may even sound like it but…"

"Caroline, wait you have it…"

"… trust me Booth when I say millions of women get through it just fine. Not that I have any personal experience…thank the Lord. I'm happy to hear you have an excuse but the rest of the squints better get back to the lab pronto."

"She was shot Caroline!" Booth said through gritted teeth. "I'm at GWU waiting to see if she'll make it through the night."

There was just a fleeting moment of silence as Caroline processed the information before she snapped. "Well why didn't you say that in the damn first place, cher?. I'm on my way."

Booth let out a deep breath and stared at the now silent phone. He scrolled down his list of contacts until he reached Max Keenan's name. Booth never wanted to have the notorious criminals contact information in his contact list in case one of his colleagues should notice but Max had input the information himself for 'just in case' purposes. Unfortunately, now was one of those times.

After the fourth ring, he knew he would be greeted by a voice mail message rather than the man himself. He didn't know which was worse. How did you tell someone in a message that their daughter might...no! He wasn't going there.

"Max...it's Booth. Call me when you get this message. It's important." He ended the call. Closing his eyes, he pressed the phone against his forehead half expecting it to vibrate against his skin with a return call.

He blew at a breath and looked up Russ' name. Hitting the call button, he waited. When Russ picked up, Booth could hear the sounds of little girls giggling in the background.

"Hello." Russ answered jovially.

"Russ, it's Booth."

"Oh, hey Booth. Hold on a sec...girls settle down, I'll play Operation with you in a little bit...Sorry about that. Game night." Russ explained. "So what's up? My sister pop yet?" He laughed.

Booth was suddenly struck dumb...couldn't bring himself to utter the words again.

"Booth?" Russ' questioning voice was a lot less full of humor now. An inner instinct bred from years of evading the law kicked into high gear telling him that something was wrong. "Booth? What is it?"

"Tempe" Booth found himself using the nickname Russ called her by. "There's been..." God, he couldn't even say it. He squeezed his eyes shut, felt the moisture gathering again in the corners of his lids.

"There's been a what, Booth?" Russ spoke very slowly.

"Temperance...she's in the hospital. She was shot."

"Shot!" He shouted, not even noticing his step-daughters jump in reaction, nor the subsequent whimpers that followed. "What the hell? How is she? Where is she?"

"We're at GWU. I won't lie Russ. It's bad." Booth managed to choke out.

"The baby?"

"The baby...she...Lauren, she's okay. The doctors managed an emergency c-section."

Russ exhaled a deep breath. "Does Max know?"

"I left a message on his voice mail. I didn't go into detail. I just told him to call me."

"Okay, okay. I'll try him too. Every fifteen minutes if I have too."

Good, Booth thought. He would rather not be the one to tell this to Max Keenan if he could help it. "Thank you."

"I'll be there as soon as I can. And Booth?"

"Yeah." He felt so tired all of a sudden.

"My sister is not going anywhere. You'll see."

Booth hung up and stared at the bed wanting nothing more than to crawl under the sheets and fall into oblivion. He was surprised none of the nurses on the floor had tried to make him do just that. He was a current guest of the hospital after all. He wouldn't be fully discharged until the next afternoon and that was just fine with him. ICU wouldn't allow overnight visitors and there was no way he was leaving this hospital. So if he would have to sleep a couple of floors below her, he would.


	5. Chapter 5

"Angie?" Hodgins whispered gently shaking his wife's shoulder. She had fallen asleep resting her head on the edge of Brennan's bed. "Angie?"

"Huh?" Angela woke up with a start disoriented to where she was until her eyes settled on her best friend and choked back a sob. "I was hoping it was just a horrible nightmare."

Hodgins rubbed circles in her back and leaned over to kiss the top of her head. "I know, babe. I know."

She kissed Brennan's hand before sitting up, wiping at her nose with a tissue.

"Maybe we should go home Angela. You're exhausted."

Angela shook her head back and forth in fierce denial. "No. I promised Booth I would stay until he came back from calling Max. I'm not leaving her alone Jack. I can't. She needs to know someone is with her...someone is _always_ with her."

He squeezed her shoulders looking down at their beloved friend. "Okay." he said simply. "We'll stay."

"Where's Cam and Sweets?" She asked leaning into her husband.

"Cam said something about dusgusting hospital coffee and went for a Starbucks run and Sweets is trying to keep the press at bay."

"Vultures." She spat.

"Yeah. Apparantly this is big news and they'll rip the FBI apart on this one. A pregnant employee shot on their watch? As if enough people didn't trust the government...me included."

"It's all falling apart isn't it?" Angela said feeling defeated.

"Hey." Hodgins crouched to eye level with his wife and caressed her soft cheek with his knuckles. "We've been through worse...we'll get through this too."

"But will Bren?" She choked back a sob and turned her eyes back to her friend.

* * *

><p>The temperature had plummeted as soon as day had given over to night but Cam didn't mind. Settling the coffe on a nearby bench, she reached into her coat pocket grabbing the one vice she continued to fall back on in times of extreme stress. She lit the cigarette and inhaled deeply, closing her eyes at the familiar burn of nicotine in her throat. Oh she knew she was being hypocritical on so many levels, being a doctor and a parent, but right now she couldn't seem to care.<p>

When she heard footsteps in her direction, she barely cast a glance at the approaching form before she recognized him. Cam almost considered throwing the cigarette away but decided against it. She wasn't fifteen anymore and had no reason to act as such.

"Dr. Saroyan? Are you...are you _smoking_?" Dr. Sweets voice seemed to rise several octaves on the last word.

Cam nodded the same time she exhaled when he got to her. She waved her hand in front of her face to diffuse some of the smoke as he leaned back on his heels as though it was the most repugant thing on earth. Cam fought to keep from rolling her eyes.

"Yes. I believe I am." Cam answered matter of factly. "They calm me down."

Sweets shook his head and gave a condescending chuckle. "Actually, Dr. Saroyan." He said scratching the side of his nose. "That would be impossible considering nicotine is a stimulant."

Cam's eyes narrowed at the young psychologist and he gulped nervously taking a step back. "Tell me Dr. Sweets. Have you ever smoked?"

"Well there was this one time in college..." He saw Cam's eyes narrow even further. "That doesn't count, huh?"

Cam shook her head slowly before she took another drag "No. It doesn't. So trust me on this one. Okay?"

"Yeah...sure." He said feeling more than a little intimidated. "I'm going to go back inside. Are you coming?"

"I'm going to air out for a little bit. Can you take the coffee up for me?"

"No problem" He said picking up the cardboard tray. "Dr. Saroyan...Cam...if you want to talk...not as a professional but as a friend...I'm here."

Cam nodded and gave him a small smile. "I know."

She watched him go into the hospital. Stamping out her cigarette in the provided ashtray, she let out a sigh, her gaze moving skyward up the stories of the large building. Her reprieve was over. It was time to go back in. It was going to be a long night.

* * *

><p>The white foggy mist blanketed her feet and swirled over her body effectively obscuring any view, if any, she might have had of her surroundings.<p>

Blank

White

Nothingness

Where was she? Her last recollection was looking into Andrew Hacker's face distorted with an emotion she had never encountered from him before…could it have been grief? Anger? And the pain…she remembered that so well, she even felt the phantom aches so much she looked down at herself and was shocked to find no evidence that there had ever been a gunshot at all except it had happened, hadn't it? Even more frightening was the fact that her stomach was flat.

Brennan clutched her hand to her stomach mourning the loss of the significantly sized roundness she had acquired over the past months and panicked, nearly falling to her knees on the bottomless floor she could only detect and not see.

Where is my daughter? Where's Booth? She hugged herself as she waited for the answers to come to her. But waiting wasn't what Temperance Brennan did well. In a huff, she began to walk through the fine mist searching for something.

A portion of the fog cleared slightly in front of her and Booth appeared suddenly within her view. He looked tired, haggard; his eyes brimming red and a daisy clasped in his trembling hands.

"Why Bones? Why?" He leaned over placing his stretched palms on something. It was only when the fog cleared a little more that she could see his hands were on a coffin.

"NO!" She shouted. "I'm right here Booth. I'm right here." Her shout turned into brokenly sobbed pleas "I'm right here." She whispered once more in a level just above a secret.

But he didn't hear her. He turned away, walking slowly. He was alone.

"My baby Booth! Where is my baby?" She sobbed frantically, clutching her abdomen and this time she did crumble to her knees. Why couldn't she see her baby?

* * *

><p>Booth heard the frantic calls for a code blue as soon as the elevator door to Bones' floor opened and he felt his heart plummet to the floor. Willing his feet to move forward, he jogged towards Bones' room after the racing nurses ran past him. An orderly rushed by pushing a crash cart across the tiled floor, calling for people to move out of his way with practiced ease before disappearing behind the blind covered glass windows that was Bones' room.<p>

Hodgins hovered in the doorway of the room trying to catch a glimpse of what was going on. All he saw was the now nauseating color of blue scrubs blurring about. They had been quickly booted from the room as soon as the alarms on the machines hooked up to Brennan sounded off.

Angela gasped an "Oh no" when she saw Booth closing in from one direction and Cam and Sweets from another.

Sweets had seen Booth's intent and immediately locked eyes with Hodgins in silent communication that they had to stop him. Neither of them were strong men by any stretch of the imagination; both enjoyed more mental pursuits than physical but both knew that had to prevent Booth by any means necessary from going into that room.

Booth barreled past them, his sole intention was to get to Bones. Nothing else mattered. That was until he felt two sets of arms link under his armpits, pulling him back just has he got to the threshold of the door.

"Let me go!" He growled like a mad man fighting against the human restraints on his arms; struggling for freedom.

"Not gonna happen, man" Hodgins said fiercely through gritted teeth, both his arms locked around Booth's bicep, his feet grasping for purchase on the floor as his body shook with the effort of keeping Booth at bay.

"Any disruption can cost Dr. Brennan her life." Sweets said trying the rational approach.

It worked. Booth stopped fighting and they reluctantly let go.

Booth stood their tense, panting...fighting dry heaves as the doctors tried fervently to shock the life back into the mother of his child...the love of his life.

He heard them shout instructions to raise the volts, saw her legs jump slightly as the defilibrator made contact with her flesh...heard the steady beep of the machine announcing it hadn't worked. These actions were repeated several times before one of the doctor's tiredly took off his mask and wiped the back of his hand across his forehead.

"Call it."

They were giving up, Booth thought as he shot forward too quickly for Sweets or Hodgins to react.

"Again." Booth shouted the demand as he walked to her side, shoving passed anyone that didn't move out of his way. "Try again."

His chest heaved under the weight he felt pressing on him as he stood there like a wild man. He refused to look at her...refused to register the knowledge that she may not come back. It wasn't an option.

"I'm sorry." One of the doctor's said sympathetically with a slight shake of his head.

"No." Booth would not accept apologies, only actions. "One more time. _Please_." He begged. "Or so help me, I'll do it myself."

* * *

><p>"All is well with your family, Joy." Came the soothing female voice that echoed from far away. The cadence of the tone held a familiar quality to it, one she had trouble naming. No matter the comfort in the voice, it didn't bring her any relief, only made her more frustrated that she couldn't see who it came from.<p>

"My name is Temperance." She corrected indignantly feeling a sense of shock being called by her birth name...a name that remained foreign to her.

"Here, you are Joy. The name you were Christened with."

"Where are we? Who are you?" The questions came in a frantic rush; all the rationality and logic that she cocooned herself in were gone.

"What do you remember?" The voice was closer now but Brennan couldn't see past the endless fog surrounding her.

"I suffered thoracic trauma due to a gunshot wound to my chest region." The answer was automatic and clinical and normal. "I answered your question. Now answer mine."

"The answer is not as simple as the question."

"Questions." Brennan said correcting her, emphasizing the plural. "I asked two questions."

"So you did, Joy." The melodic choice tinkled in laughter. "You are in the inbetween."

"Inbetween what?"

"The realm of the living and the dead."


	6. Chapter 6

Brennan, who never took anything at face value was not going to start doing so now. She probed, prodded, investigated, dissected, weighed, measured and analyzed before reaching a conclusive answer. This time was no different. Quickly calculating, she assembled the facts as she was aware of them.

She had been shot, most likely near fatally. She would have gone into surgery and given high dosages of anesthesia. Perhaps coma had been induced and by such, barbiturates would have been introduced into her bloodstream creating a dream state.

"You are trying to reason it out." The soft echoing voice spoke again in understanding and a trace of humor.

"I am very clearly in a coma dream and you are just a hallucinatory voice my mind has created as a direct result of the anesthesia pumping through my blood stream." Brennan thrust her chin up daring the unseen woman to defy her logic.

"Oh, Joy, even as a child you were always so dogmatic." The woman came forward sweeping the fog around her. "I always told Max that faith and science were not mutually exclusive."

"_M…Mom_?" Brennan questioned with a catch in her throat. Her knees felt weak watching the ethereal illusion of her mother walk towards her. "Now I know I am dreaming." She muttered to herself.

"I love you, Joy. I never wanted to leave you." Her mother's luminous image implored causing Brennan to suck in a large breath.

Memories filtered in that she had long ago tried to suppress and tuck away; memories of watching the back of her parents car disappear done the road never to return, of Russell leaving her unable to handle the pressure of becoming an instant parent of a fifteen year old, of social services stepping in, of being placed from foster home to foster home where she was neither wanted nor loved, memories of being left transforming into images of her being the one leaving. She was angry.

"But you did." Brennan's words were sharp and anguished. "You left, Dad left, Russell left. And I had nothing..._no one_."

"I'm sorry. I know it's not enough and I know our actions made you close off within yourself and shy away from everything that could hurt you. But look at you now...who you have become. Despite everything, you are in love, you are loved...you are a mother with a mother's love."

"Yes." Brennan said defiantly through tears. "Booth loves me and I...I love him...I love our daughter." She admitted.

Her mother nodded. "So you must know the lengths you are willing to go through...what you would sacrifice to keep them safe. You've _already_ done it. Nearly the ultimate sacrifice...putting their lives ahead of yours so they could live. Tell me do you think of it as abandonment?"

"No, of course not."

"Do you think Booth and your daughter would consider it as abandonment?"

"There is no reason why they should. Death is not the same thing as leaving by choice."

"But you knew the risks of what you were doing. You made that _choice_ knowing what the outcome could be, so in this case, isn't it the same thing?"

Brennan never got to answer. A loud droning high pitch noise reached her ears just then making her want to cover her ears. It made her body thrum and pulsate. The noise sounded vaguely familiar but in this dream world, she couldn't recall where she had heard it before. The hallucination of her mother seemed to hear it too if the look on her face was any indication.

"It's too soon." Came her mother's growl of denial.

"What's happening?" She asked the image even if it was irrational to do so.

"You're flatlining, Joy." She said with a faraway look in her eyes like she could see something Brennan could not. "They're trying to give up but your Booth won't let them."

"You can see them?"

"Look"

With a wave of Ruth Brennan's hand, another image appeared before her eyes. It was cloudy but as she peered at it she could very clearly see herself as she had never wanted to; with tubes and IV needles, sickly pale...deathlike. It was an unnerving sight. She had to distance herself emotionally from death all the time but this time it was different...this time it was her own.

Booth was screaming, pushing his way through the room. His shoulders heaving with each heavy breath, his eyes anguished, tormented and so very angry. Brennan couldn't help but cringe and want to reach her hand out to him in comfort...to tell him everything was going to be alright. Except that would be a lie...she didn't know if it would be.

She saw the doctor shake his head. "I'm sorry." He sounded defeated.

"_NO!"_ Booth was enraged. "One more time, _please_. Or so help me I will do it myself."

The doctor nodded and prepped again for one more jolt, increasing the voltage. Booth sidled up to the side of the bed and held her hand in his and Brennan could swear her hand in this dreamworld actually tingled at the contact.

"You swore you wouldn't abandon me, Bones." He whispered harshly into her ear before placing a kiss on her brow, his eyes clenched tightly shut. "I'm going to hold you to that promise...please fight...please come back to me."

It hit her then. What her mother was trying to get her to see. She couldn't...she _wouldn't_ break her promise. Her mother smiled and nodded at her as she felt it...the electricity course through her making her inhale sharply. Then there was nothing.

* * *

><p>Booth held his breath as the doctor's tried one more time. "Please, baby, please." He whispered as her body jerked under the paddles. He never took his eyes off the monitors waiting for the ominous straight line to take a different shape.<p>

Beep...beep...beep.

He hung his head in relief, tears slipping down the side if his nose.

"That was too close, baby." He trembled as he smoothed her hair off her brow. "Too damn close."

Booth turned to the doctor's and nurses. Too emotional to speak anymore he nodded once in thanks and looked towards the doorway where their friends had gathered giving them a thumbs up signal and a watery smile.

Wiping his eyes with the palms of his hands, Booth numbly let the nurses usher him out of the room while the doctors sought to determine why Brennan had suddenly coded. He shuddered at the sound of the pale blue curtain sliding closed behind him.

Angela was the first to pull him into a tight hug.

"Thank you for not giving up." She told him gripping her hands tighter around his neck.

"Never." Booth managed to squeeze out through Angela's choke hold.

"Ange...let the guy breathe." Hodgins said tugging at her coat.

"Sorry, sorry." She mumbled as she pulled back. "What do you think happened?" She asked turning towards the closed curtain with a furrowed brow and her thumb nail at her mouth.

"It could be so many things." Cam answered. She had joined the fray just as Booth had shoved his way into the room. "We'll just have to wait."

Booth wanted to punch something...anything. He was strung at the end of his rope and didn't know how long he could hold on without having a complete meltdown.

Down the hall a commotion was starting. Caroline Julian's distinct New Orleans furious drawl could be heard clearly as she barreled though the nurse trying to halt her progress.

"Ma'am, you can't go back there."

"Get your hand off me, Cherie." Caroline huffed giving the girl a disgusted once over. "Or I will have you thrown in jail faster than a crawfish trying to hightail it from a net."

"Uh oh." Sweets muttered under her breath as he started to walk towards them. "Let me take care of this." He said with a backwards glance as she picked up her pace.

A look of relief passed over Caroline's features when she spotted the young psychologist coming her way. She shook off the offending hand and stormed down the hall feeling rather than seeing the nurse throw up her hands and roll her eyes, giving up.

"Ms. Julian, you are disrupting the whole ICU unit." Sweets chastised her.

Caroline harrumphed as she adjusted her coat. "I wouldn't be disrupting anything Cher, if some people would just keep their hands to themselves." She stole a disgusted glance backwards. "Now, what's going on with my favorite anthropologist?"

Sweet sighed heavily as he guided her the rest of the way down the hall explaining the dire situation as they went. When they had reached Booth, she pulled him down to her level, wrapping him into a maternal hug so tight he thought he might suffocate in her ample bosom.

"Dr. Brennan is going to be making us all feel like uneducated idiots for many more years, Cher, I promise you." She patted him on the back and pulled back leaving her hands on her shoulders.

"I hope you're right Caroline."

"You should know better than to argue with a federal prosecutor, Agent."

The curtain swished open again causing the group to take a startled look back. They watched as Brennan was quickly wheeled on a gurney down the hallway. Panicked, Booth grabbed her doctor's arm in a vice like grip.

"What's happening?" He asked, his eyes never leaving Brennan as she was paraded through the corridor.

Dr. Warren gave Booth a solemn stare before addressing him. "We believe we may have missed a very small internal bleed which caused her cardiac arrest. We're bringing her into surgery now to correct it."

"You _missed_ it!" Booth exploded. Sweets put a restraining hand on Booth's arm but enraged, he shook it off. "You're supposed to be one of the best. How the hell did you miss it?"

"If it's small enough, it doesn't present itself right away. These things sometimes..."

"Don't..." Booth clenched a fist. "Don't you _dare_ tell me that these things happen. Just...just_ fix_ her." He cried out hoarsely.

"I'll do the best I can." He nodded before walking away swiftly.

Booth felt himself become lightheaded, his breath coming in quick pants as he gripped onto Sweets for support.

"Booth...Booth!"

Hodgins was calling to him but he could barely think to answer him.

"You need to stay focused buddy." Hodgins continued in what he hoped was a soothing voice.

Focus? Booth felt a maniacal laugh bubble from his throat as he swiped angrily at his eyes. Focus on what? The pain? the anguish? The fact that the woman he had loved for years may not make it through the night? That his precious newborn girl would grow up without a mother? That some bastard had destroyed the life he had been working towards in the blink of an eye?

There it was, he thought as the muscle in his jaw beat in time with the pounding of his heart. He found his focus. "Where is he? Where is Carson?" His growl was inhuman and intensely feral...so much so it had them all taking a surprised step back.

"I don't think that's a wise course of action right now." Sweets stammered out nervously.

"Fuck being wise!" He whispered out harshly when all he wanted to do was shout. "Someone take me to him now or I swear to God, I will rip apart this hospital trying to find him."

He looked at each of them one by one but no one would meet his eyes...except for Caroline.

"I'll take you Cher." Caroline straightened her shoulders. "But mind your manners." She warned. The first time I see you reach for his throat, I'll hogtie you before you get within five feet of the scum."

* * *

><p>It was a small mercy that Carson was being kept in a different wing of the hospital…but only a small one. Each footstep sent the resounding sound of a thunderclap through his ears as he followed Caroline. He could hear his own harsh breathing echoing and not much else. His mind conjured images of the obscene torture he wanted to impart on the animal that had the nerve to still be alive.<p>

"What?" He asked annoyed just realizing that Caroline was speaking to him again.

"I hear tales that your baby girl is a real beaut; using her Boothy charm on all those nurses in NICU."

Booth let himself give a warm smile at the thought of his daughter before he scowled and looked at the smug attorney.

"You're trying to soften me up before we go in there, aren't you?" He accused.

"Is it working?"

"A little." He admitted ruefully.

"Good." She linked her arms with his. "The rest of the way you can tell me what the nursery looks like. I can't imagine anyone wanting to kill someone after talking pastels and mobiles."

Booth's pace quickened and his pulse began to race like tiny helicopter propellers as soon as he spotted two federal agents standing at attention outside a room door.

"Are you sure you're ready for this Booth?" Caroline asked him as she scurried to catch up.

NO, a voice in his head wanted to roar out loud. Instead he could only offer her the briefest of nods. He didn't trust himself to speak just yet.

Showing his badge to the other agents was merely a formality as much as it was automatic. They knew who he was…why he was there. They were understandably hesitant to allow him access to the patient inside but their sympathy to his situation prevailed and they let him through with a warning.

"Five minutes and the door remains open." One of them said sternly as they let him pass.

Up to this point Booth hadn't planned on what he would say or actually do. He only knew he needed an outlet for the rage that was consuming him…to face the bastard…to ask him why?Why would he do this? He stood motionless as he stared at the sleeping man on the bed and wanted nothing more than to rip the IV needles from his arms, throw him against the wall and ram his fist repeatedly into his face.

His expression must have mirrored his thoughts because Caroline looked at him disapprovingly.

"Remember the hogtie." She warned.

The man on the bed's eyes opened to small slits as a smug smile broadened his lips. "Well, well, well, if it isn't Agent Booth." Carson said groggily as he used his elbows to pull him into a sitting position. "I'd love to chat but my attorney informed me that to speak with me, you must go through him."

"You're lawyered up already?" Booth was aghast. "What idiot attorney would take on your case?"

"One that likes a fat paycheck."

"One that likes to lose you mean." Caroline gave the killer before her a disgusted look.

"We'll see." Carson's tone was taunting, setting Booth's teeth on edge.

"Three counts of attempted murder, especially a federal agent and an 8 month pregnant woman carries a hefty punishment." Caroline informed him. "Even without the other evidence. No matter what cock-a-mamey story your lawyer fabricates, a jury would never believe you."

"Oh they don't have to believe _me_." Carson's smile increased. "They just have to doubt _you_. Isn't that how our lovely system works? Besides, we all know that dead women can't testify."

He didn't think…just reacted. With a roar filled with all mighty rage, Booth lunged so fast Caroline scrambled to catch up to him. Throwing her arms around him, she screamed for the guards. She didn't know if she could restrain Booth, not in this state he was in and she chastised herself for agreeing to ever let him come in here.

The two agents saw what was happening and quickly restrained a heaving Booth, pulling him from the room as he struggled to break free from their grasp.

"Stop it, Agent!" One of the yelled as they shoved him face first towards the wall. "I don't want to have to arrest you."

Booth nodded in between seething pants as the words and their consequences filtered through the angered red haze in his brain. Arresting him would mean he couldn't see Bones. He couldn't let that happen.

"I'm okay. I'm good." He assured them. He wasn't really but he had control enough over himself now that they could let him go. He wouldn't seek out Carson again.

Caroline stared down Carson with the darkest look she could conjure as he sat there with a satisfied smirk on his face. "You better thank the Good Lord above that I care more about his life than your death." She imparted before leaving without a backwards glance. Grabbing Booth by the sleeve, she pulled him down the hall, past the shocked looks of the staff. "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't slap you upside the head right now." She bit out angrily.

"You heard what he said."

Caroline whirled on him. "He purposefully goaded you and _you_ took the bait."

Booth didn't deny it. "I'm going to have guards place by her door as soon as she gets out of surgery." He informed her.

Her face softened as the tumultuous emotions he was feeling played over his face. "I think that's a good idea, Cherie."


	7. Chapter 7

Booth woke up slowly. Eyes still closed he felt the mattress next to him for the soft contours of Bones' warm body. His hand came in contact with cold stiff sheets. Sitting up swiftly with a hitch in his breath, he scrubbed his eyes with the palm of his hands as memories from the day before threatened to suck him under.

Bones

Shot

Baby

Carson

Blood

Flat line

Her second surgery had taken a few hours. Once he had been told she had made it through and was being wheeled into recovery, he had begrudgingly allowed one of the nurses to coax him back to his own hospital room to get some much needed sleep. He doubted he would be able to; his mind was too filled with devastating possibilities.

Sleep must have come to him unwillingly because outside the window, the sun was shining and the corridors outside his room were teaming with activity. Just as he bent down to retrieve the slippers from the cold tiled floor a nurse walked into his room with his breakfast.

He wasn't hungry. Not even the sight of the custard on the tray could tempt him to eat. He only thought of getting out of this room and seeing the two people that meant more to him than anything else.

The nurse looked over his chart and nodded. "Looks like you're being discharged after breakfast." She told him. "You should eat it."

Booth grimaced, his stomach rolling in waves at the thought even as it let out a growl. When was the last time he had eaten? He couldn't remember. Was it the French toast, Bones had made him for breakfast only the day before…before he set out to the hunting cabin to question Carson? _Oh God_, he wanted to heave but there was nothing but the taste of bile in his mouth.

"Not hungry." He muttered as he angrily reached to grab his clothes.

"You really should eat something." She told him. "It's important to keep your strength up, especially now. Besides, they won't let you into ICU or NICU right now. Shift change." She explained.

"How did you know?" He asked her, never seeing her before today.

The nurse rolled her eyes. "Everyone knows. You're big news around here, Agent Booth and probably most of the metropolitan DC area as well."

"Great." He muttered sarcastically as the tray was set down in front of him. He picked the fork up showing little gusto for the scrambled eggs and toast but knowing the nurse was right. He had to eat even if everything he put in his mouth held the same amount of appeal as sawdust and tasted like it as well.

Once discharged, Booth felt like he was pulled in two different directions; Bones or Lauren. Both needed his attention right now; one was clinging to life, the other was just starting it.

I'm lost here, Bones. What should I do?

He made his way to the NICU unit, knowing with absolute certainty that Bones would demand his attention here, with their daughter.

She had been taken out of the incubator but still looked so small with wires connected to her little body monitoring her. Her eyes opened when he traced his finger along the soft downy skin of her arm; her body squirming happily under the touch.

"Good morning, baby girl." He whispered and felt like his heart would break as she looked at him so trustingly.

"Would you like to feed her?"

Booth heard the soft voice of a nurse behind him. He turned to her and focused on the tiny bottle in her hand before looking back at her face.

"Can I?" He asked uncertain. It had been years since he fed an infant.

"Of course you can." She said as she grabbed a chair to pull it over. "Just sit here and I'll put her in your arms. Are you right or left handed?"

He had to glance at his hands and think for a moment. "Uh…right."

"Okay." Mindful of the tubes, she picked the infant up. "I'm going to rest her head on your left arm, make sure you support the neck and you'll hold the bottle with your right. When she's done, sit her up, hold her gently under her chin and pat her on the back until she burps. Babies get fussy if they have gas."

"Adults too." Booth joked to press down on his nervousness as the nurse arranged his daughter in his arms.

"Hmmm, that they do." The nurse smiled looking down at them. "She won't break, Mr. Booth." She assured him.

He wasn't too convinced of that. "Thank you." He told her as she walked away to give them some privacy.

This was the first time he held his daughter in his arms and it felt amazing. For nearly nine months, he had waited for her arrival; watching her grow through ultrasound pictures and fuzzy digital video. She was here and she couldn't be more perfect.

Her mouth latched onto the nipple, sucking greedily at the formula within. Booth couldn't help but think she inherited his appetite. He spoke to her as she drank, hummed music of lullabyes from long ago that he could no longer recall the words to and choked on a sob as her tiny hand found his finger and squeezed.

"It's like nothing else in the world, isn't it Booth?"

The hoarse sound of Max Keenan's voice reached his ears and startled, he turned to look at him. Max was more disheveled than he had ever seen him, his hands resting in the pockets of wrinkled pants, stubble that was more gray than dark blonde adorned his face, dark crescents took residence under his eyes.

He acknowledged Bones' father with a nod and eyes full of apologies. "Only one thing would make it complete." He said with a sad crooked smile.

"How is she?" He asked nodding at the baby in his arms.

Booth looked down at his daughter, drinking peacefully with no knowledge of the tumult around her. "She's good…great. Healthier than they expected...considering the circumstances."

Max sighed heavily as he sat in a nearby chair, shoulders slumped with weariness. "What happened Booth? And don't give me that official claptrap the FBI has been dishing to the media. I want the _real_ story."

Booth looked at Max pleadingly, his hands starting to tremble. "Not here Max, _please_. Not while _she_ is in my arms."

Max accepted that but his face turned into a grim mask. "I heard _he's_ here too."

"Yes." Booth admitted knowing he would find out even if he didn't tell him. "But you can't touch him."

"He deserves it for what he did to my Tempe. Don't deny it."

"I won't." Booth shook his head. "But he'll get his punishments in the court. His actions affected more than just our family, Max. Give the other victims' families the chance to face him down just like I did."

"You saw him."

"Yes."

Max leaned forward in his chair, his fists resting on his knees. "And?"

Booth's jaw clenched fighting to hold back the rage. "I wanted to kill him."

"Why didn't you?"

He wanted to say because it was the right thing to do; that his moral compass was too ingrained in him to stray that far from it but that would be a lie. "Caroline Julian stopped me."

Having met the Federal prosecutor before, Max smirked briefly in understanding.

XXXXX

Max cleared his throat and eased into the vinyl covered chair next to his daughter's hospital bed. In his life he had made many hard choices, many of them not the right ones at least not where the law was concerned. But the hardest decision he had ever made was to leave her believing it was for the best…to save her life...to protect her. He had failed her then. He would not do so now.

"I saw Lauren." He started conversationally, half expecting her to respond back to him; smiling despondently when she didn't. "She is beautiful, kiddo. I am so proud of you…of this life you created for yourself. I always knew you could do it…have everything…the career…the family. I am only sorry that you ever considered yourself unworthy of it because of me and my rotten choices."

He stopped briefly to collect himself. Temperance didn't need to hear his self-effacing pity party. "You are definitely your father's daughter. I know you hate hearing that but it's true. Booth told me what you did and although I am pretty darn pissed that you went into a dangerous situation knowingly, I can't fault you for it. I think would've done the same thing. Although" he grinned. "I am a much better shot than you and would've killed the bastard."

"What's this about killing people?" Russ asked as he walked in the room, eyes darting everywhere before working up the courage to rest them on the bed.

"Russ, you made it." Max got up and embraced his son. They gave each other a supportive pat on the back.

"I should've known you'd beat me here."

"Yeah." Max admitted sheepishly. "I was sticking close to town for the past month just in case my granddaughter decided to make an early appearance. I never in all my years, thought it would happen like this." His voice broke, for the first time showing any emotion but anger since Russ had gotten in touch with him.

"You know Tempe. She never does things without flair." Russ attempted humor but it fell flat. "Booth said she coded last night." He frowned.

"I heard that too. Her friend Angela told me what Booth did. He wouldn't let them give up."

Russ nodded. "Yeah, I may hate the guy's profession but I'll always be grateful he's in her life."

"Which is why we can't tell him."

"Tell him what?"

"Carson is going down and it's not going to be our good old justice system that's going to do it."

"Dad..." Russ said uncomfortably.

"So..." Max rubbed his hands together almost gleefully. "Are you in?"

XXXXX

"I know you want to see Bones, Buddy but the hospital rules say you have to be fourteen to visit in ICU." Booth said attempting to explain to his son on the phone. With all the hell he had been through the day before, he hadn't thought to call his son and tell him personally. He never expected he would hear it on the news. But the five worried messages on his voice mail had told Booth that's exactly what happened.

"The lady on the TV said Bones was in critical condition." Parker pronounced the words slowly and uncertainly. "I asked Mom what that meant and she said Bones was hurt real bad."

"Yeah, buddy." Booth closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose hating the fact that he had to have this conversation. "Bones was hurt very badly."

"Is she gonna die?"

He heard the tears in his son's voice and wished like hell he could reach through the phone and wrap his arms around him, reassuring him everything was going to be fine.

"NO!" Booth shouted, wincing as he did so. "No, she's not going to die." He added softening his tone. "I promise." He prayed it was a promise he could keep.

"Well, Miss Dunford, my teacher said Bones was stupid and irre..irresponsible for doing what she did cause she was pregnant."

Booth clenched his fist, his anger slamming into him full force. How dare Parker's teacher say that to him? When Bones was healed he was going to make damn sure the principal was aware of what the teacher had done and if possible get his son switched from her class.

"You tell, Miss Dunford that Bones is a hero...you got that, Parks. A hero. She saved my life." He may be pissed that she put herself in danger but he would be damned if he let a stranger talk that way about her.

"Jeez Dad, I did that already." Parker said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"That's my boy."

"Dad, do you think I can see Lauren? I mean I am her big brother and all. Bones said that it was an important job and I want to make sure I do it right."

Booth felt the tears stinging his eyes as he fought for composure. "I'll tell you what, Buddy. I'll ask and if they say yes, I'll see if your mom can bring you over to visit. Okay?"

"That would be awesome!"

"Can you put your mother on the phone for me now?"

"Sure. Love you Dad."

"Love you too Parks."

"Seeley?" Rebecca said after Parker gave her the phone. "What's up?"

"Hey, do you think you can swing by the hospital with Parker if they let him visit?"

"Sure, Seeley. Anything you need. How are you holding up?"

"I've seen better days." He said noncommitally, unwilling to share with her the depths of his turmoil. Instead he gripped his hand tighter on the phone and rested his forehead against the wall seeking to steady the wave of turbulent emotion that threatened to overcome him.

"She'll be okay." Rebecca tried to sound confident. "You have to believe that."

"I know, I know." He swallowed past the lump in his throat. "And, Becca? Thanks."

"You're quite welcome, Seeley."


	8. Chapter 8

A/N- Happy Holidays Everyone! I hope you enjoy the next installment. Reviews make great presents and they are free. Sadly, I do not own Bones or the characters.

* * *

><p>Agent Genny Shaw considered it a privilege and an honor that Agent Booth had called to ask that she personally be the one to search Dr. Brennan's car for any evidence to Carson's crime spree. She had been steadily gaining the senior agent's trust and approval and his most recent request gave her the hope that even with her slightly bumbling nature, her eagerness to do her job right had not gone unnoticed.<p>

The footsteps of her sensible government issued shoes echoed on the cement of the parking garage in the Hoover Building. Resigned to a darkened corner of the lot, the Prius had been taped off here rather than delegated to the standard impound lot for cars taken in for evidence.

In all honesty, Genny had no idea what she might be looking for but Agent Booth was adamant that Dr. Brennan would have left something in the car that could be used in the case against Carson. "It may not be obvious." He had said. "What Dr. Brennan _thinks_ is obvious is usually not to anyone besides the squints." He had even suggested she take one of them with her but she wanted to show him she could do it on her own. Now she wondered if she had been too hasty in that decision.

She ducked under the bright yellow tape and approached the back end of the car. Snapping on her gloves and squaring her shoulders, she slid the keys from her pocket and opened the trunk.

Sifting through the contents, she found nothing even remotely out of sorts; three water bottles, a yoga mat, a forensics field kit and an auto emergency kit complete with a flare gun and various first aid items. Closing the trunk, she moved on to the back seats of the car.

Maneuvering around the car seat in the center was a small challenge and after a search through the side compartments on the doors and on the backs of the front seats she came up with only a few more water bottles.

Crawling through to the front of the car, she sat in the driver's seat and pulled down the visor. A pair of sunglasses fell in her lap, making her jump.

She smiled when she spotted the "What to Expect: The First Year" on the passenger seat of the car. Thumbing through it she noticed many pages were tagged with various colored post-it notes and passages were highlighted in yellow.

"Getting ahead of yourself, I see." Genny chuckled to herself then sobered as she put the book back down and picked up a baby catalogue. Again, the pages were marked. She read through some of the scribbled notes the Doctor had written next to some of the items and smiled at how thorough Dr. Brennan was being over the selection process for her infant's toys. Were all mothers-to-be this neurotic?

The glove compartment held nothing of note; an instruction manual to the car, an EZ Pass for road tolls and of course, a pair of soft black leather gloves. With a sigh, she shut the compartment and flipped open the middle armrest in between the two seats. And was met with nothing but loose change.

Genny rested her head on the steering wheel. She had nothing. Her head sprang up in sudden inspiration. Her purse. She couldn't recall if Dr. Brennan's purse was written anywhere on the list of evidence already taken into custody. Thinking of where she would place her purse if she wanted to conceal it, Genny leaned over, her fingers stretching and reaching under the passenger seat until she came into contact with a leather strap.

"Bingo!" She exclaimed excitedly nearly bouncing in her exuberance over the small victory.

Pulling the large bag from under the seat, she began to empty and inspect the contents; trying not to feel like a voyeur as she did so. Nestled deep in the pockets was an audio recorder. Her pulse began to drum rapidly as she spotted a tape inside the device. Once it was rewound, she hit the play button and wished almost immediately that she hadn't.

She shouldn't be listening to this. It was possibly the last words she would ever speak to Agent Booth. It was too personal even if it could technically be declared evidence to the case. She shut the tape off deciding to give it to Booth. He would be the one to decide what to do with it. She didn't want to have that decision rest in her hands.

Quickly putting the contents of the purse back in, she scrambled out of the car intent on getting to the hospital as soon as possible.

* * *

><p>"Guess who I found skulking around the fifth floor?" Caroline walked over to Booth in the cafeteria followed by an agent holding Russ and Max by the backs of their collars. Both had the grace to look a bit sheepish.<p>

"We don't skulk" Max bristled. "We _reconnoiter._"

"Humph." She slapped him on the back of his head causing him to cringe and rub his hair where she made contact. "Same difference." Caroline retorted.

Booth had a feeling this would happen which is why he had the agents keep an extra eye out on the two. He signaled to the agent to let them go. This was something he wanted to deal with himself.

"I won't ask why." Booth shoved a hand through his hair in frustration. "But _damnit_, you two. I don't want to put you behind bars but that's where you're going to go if you keep this up."

"Technically Booth, we _didn't_ do anything wrong." Russ said defensively.

"_Yet_." Booth added to his statement. "_C'mon guys._ What do you take me for? I _knew_ you would do something like this. That's why I had extra eyes put on you."

"You said yourself Booth, that you wanted to kill him. We were just going to perform a community service...so to speak."

"La, la, la, la." Caroline abruptly covered her ears. "I _know_ I just did not hear that." She narrowed her eyes at Booth who wouldn't meet her gaze.

"Wanting and doing are two different things." He told them. "I respect the law and I trust that the bastard will get what he deserves..._legally_. Bones would agree with me and you know it. Now get out of my sight before I change my mind and cuff the both of you."

"Booth..." Max started.

"I mean it Max. I have enough to worry about without adding you to the list."

"But..."

"Don't you want to see your granddaughter grow up?"

Max winced. "You _had_ to play that card."

"Max, you may by a sociopath but you're not completely without heart. Now get out of here before I change my mind."

Agent Shaw ran up to Booth as soon as she saw Dr. Brennan's father and brother leave. They walked passed her, showing a brief interest before continuing down the hall, grumbling the entire time.

"Agent Booth Sir." Genny approached him cautiously sensing his mood.

"Agent Shaw, you can drop the "sir"." He told her.

"Sorry, Sir...I mean Agent Booth." She hated stumbling in front of him but he made her feel so nervous especially now. He was usually so collected, a glint of humor could be found in his eyes but now he just looked angry...angry and dead.

"Never mind." He brushed off her apology. "Did you find anything?"

"I did." She lowered her voice to a whisper. "A recording she made."

Booth looked at her confused. "Why are we whispering?"

"I don't..." She said still in a whisper before she brought her voice up to a normal level. "I don't know, sir."

"Well did you listen to it? Did you hear what was on it? Do you have it? What did she say?" He fired of the questions one after the other.

"Jeez, Chere' let the girl speak. She's not one of your suspects." Caroline said.

"Sorry, sorry." Booth pulled at his hair in frustration mostly at himself. "_Well_..." He prompted Genny when she didn't say anything.

"Oh right...Um...I do have the tape and if you don't mind me saying so...I think you should listen to it in private."

"Why?" He asked curiously.

"Well...I didn't listen to the whole thing but it was clearly a personal message to you. She time coded it. It must have been made when she was on her way to meet Carson."

* * *

><p>Not willing to leave the hospital for a more private setting, Booth charmed one of the nurses into finding an empty hospital room for him where he could listen to the tape. He knew, technically, it should be turned into evidence but he wouldn't be able to do that until he heard it.<p>

Shutting the door behind him, he opted to leave the lights off; letting the weak sun filtering in from the window cast long shadows across the room. Sitting on the bed, he stared at the device as his finger hovered shakily over the "play" button. He covered his mouth with his other hand, mentally prepping himself listen. Whatever it was...whatever Bones said...these may be her last words to him. By pressing the small green button, would he be admitting defeat? Would he be acknowledging that what she said on this would be something she would never get to say in person?

Stop thinking like that. He scolded himself. Have faith...in her...in them. She wouldn't give up on you. Don't you dare give up on her.

He pressed play.

Emitted a broken sob when he heard her voice...her usually rational, clinical voice shrouded with fear...and love.

"_Booth. I'm so very sorry. If you are listening to this then my plan did not go as desired and I am severely wounded or I am dead. Hopefully, it is the former and not the latter. _

Booth gripped the recorder harder. _Please, please_. He didn't know what he was begging for.

_At approximately 11:37, Carson telephoned me. I know this was the time because I looked at the clock thinking it was you calling about lunch as per your custom. He informed me that he had you in his custody and would, and I quote. "make sure your baby grows up without a Daddy." if I didn't meet him at the address he gave me with the damaged USB drive that can be used against him as definitive evidence. _

_Considering the nature of his crimes, I do believe he will not hesitate to follow through on his threats. This is my only foreseeable choice...the only one I can live with. It is inconceivable for me not to act when the power to save you rests on my shoulders and my shoulders alone._

_I have called Hacker to send back up and hopefully I will have enough time to distract Carson until they arrive. Please don't be too harsh with him. I did not give him any alternatives._

_I know you must be very angry with me right now but I have very sound and logical reasons for doing this and maybe most surprising of all…I am being led by my metaphorical heart._

You're right Bones. I am angry. So angry because you did something that could take you away from me forever. How am I supposed to be okay with that?

_Imagining a life without you in it since you have irrevocably changed it is not an option for me. There is a chance that I can save your life, even at the cost of my own and I am taking it. Of course, I am taking extra precaution where Lauren is concerned, so don't think I have made this decision rashly or without thought to our daughter._

_I love you Booth. Although you can infuriate me at times with your alpha male tendencies, you have made me happier than I ever imagined possible. I have evolved into a better person under your patience and care and I am profoundly thankful that we didn't miss our moment._

No we didn't. We'll have more...lots more. You just have to get better...okay Bones?

_I see Carson's hide-in now. Hopefully, I will be successful and tonight we will be celebrating the end of another case. If it doesn't turn out that way, make sure Lauren survives no matter what. Tell her every day I loved her. Tell yourself every day that I loved you. And above all Booth...be happy. For me. _

_Love, _

_Your Bones_

How can I be happy Bones? How can I ever be happy again if you don't make it? Don't you know that there is no me without you. We are the center. The center must hold.

Booth angrily wiped his eyes with the palms of his hands, pressed rewind and hit play again...and again. He memorized each tone change, each hitch of her voice, all the places she hesitated as if she was trying to find the right words. He couldn't stop hearing it...didn't want to...even though he was torturing himself.

He vacillated between wanting to hug the device to his chest or hurling it against the wall. Sanity won out. If these were her last words then by God, he could never let them go.

* * *

><p>"Make a copy of this and give it to me." Booth said when he located Agent Shaw again. "And place the original with the other evidence on the Carson case."<p>

He really wanted to keep it and not share it with the entire FBI but Bones must have known or at least suspected that what she said in the tape would have been taken in for evidence. Her precise detailing of the events prior to her meeting with Carson in the recording at hinted at that.

Agent Shaw was only too happy to comply but she registered the Agent's grim expression and had a feeling that whatever Dr. Brennan had said on the tape rattled him.

"If you don't mind my asking, sir but are you okay?"

_Was he okay?_ No, he was definitely not even close. "I'll be with Bones if anyone asks where I am." He replied skating over the question. He didn't want to lie to her but he didn't want to say the truth either.

* * *

><p>Angela gave herself a mental pat on the back as her computer beeped and the message on her screen flashed "File Retrieval Complete."<p>

She had been working on restoring the flash drive for hours. It was the only think stopping her from breaking down and crying every five minutes. Having something to do grounded her and focused her. Here, in the lab, she was needed and while her mind constantly drifted towards her best friend, she was doing this for Brennan.

Trying to access the files, she encountered another road block. They were encrypted.

"Damnit!" She shouted at her computer.

"Hey what did that expensive piece of equipment ever do to you?" Cam said walking into her office.

Angela looked up, the bright light of her monitor reflecting on her face. "I finally managed to access the files but they are encrypted."

"_Damnit_." Cam said, parroting Angela's earlier remark. "What about the encryption decoding software you have?"

"I'm going to run it but depending on how complicated the code is, it could take hours."

"It's a good thing we have time then." Cam deadpanned. "Carson's not going anywhere anytime soon."

She too, needed the sense of normalcy the lab gave her. She left the hospital late last night after assuring herself that Dr. Brennan was okay for the time being.

An hour later, Angela pulled the recovered files finally able to get into them. Scanning them briefly, eyes widening she picked up the phone and dialed into Cam's office.

"I need you to take a look at something." She spoke quickly into the receiver.

"You were able to get the files."

"Yeah but I'm not exactly sure what I'm looking at...I mean I _think_ I do but I need a second set of eyes."

"I'll be right there."

Moments later Cam rushed into Angela's office. "Okay, show me what you got."

Angela turned the monitor to Cam and watched her face for any reactions.

"_Sonofabitch_!" Cam shouted, slamming her hand on the desk. "He's not working alone."


	9. Chapter 9

It was a payoff account. One bank account transferring copious amounts into another. For what? Hits? That's what it looked like. The last two recorded amounts had the initials S.B. and T.B. typed next to them. It couldn't be a coincidence. Cam would bet the final sum the receiving account was Carson's but who was paying him off. He was going to kill them regardless of whether Dr. Brennan delivered the usb drive or not, which meant they were still in danger.

Angela did a search on the routing number of the two accounts. One account belonged to a regional bank here in D.C., the other from a bank somewhere in Maine. It was the Maine account that she focused on.

"This is going to take a while." Angela said when they hit another brick wall. Someone was covering their tracks really well through a convoluted web of dummy corporations.

"Call me when you have something." Cam told her. "I'm going to check what Hodgins was able to recover from the scene."

Finally able through weave through the web, Angela's fervent search was able to identify one name; Kenneth James. Never trust a man with two first names was the first thought that came into her mind.

"Gotcha." She smiled. Armed with his name and originating bank somewhere in Arizona, she typed the name on her keyboard to perform a multi-platform database search and encountered a very intriguing problem; there was no Kenneth James prior to five years ago. It was like he never even existed until then.

Cam and Hodgins were equally intrigued when she explained it to them.

"You know what this means don't you?" Hodgins said excitedly.

"No." Angela shook her head. "You are not going to throw out one of your conspiracy theories. Jack, we talked about this."

"But it makes perfect sense, Angela, don't you see?"

He pulled her old erasable board from the corner of the room and began to write feverishly; the marker squeaking as he went. When he was done, he looked at his work proudly.

Cam cocked her head looking at Hodgins crazy diagram...at least that's what she thought it was. "Is this supposed to make sense?"

"You need to use some imagination." Hodgins told her.

"Dr. Hodgins, this is a science lab not a fine arts workshop."

"Okay, okay." He rolled his eyes erasing the board. "You are such a party pooper."

"Hey guys, I think I found something interesting." Angela called over to them from her computer. "Look at this."

She motioned for them to look at the screen.

"See, now this makes more sense...well sort of" Cam told Hodgins. "Which database is this?" She asked as she stared at the blaring red "access denied" message flashing continuously on the screen.

"The Bureau of Prison's" Angela stated smugly as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Shouldn't we have access to this?" Cam couldn't keep the surprise from her voice.

"We _should_ and we _do_." Angela agreed. "But not for this particular file we, don't."

"I'm calling Hacker." Cam said still staring at the screen and picking up the phone to dial.

Angela and Hodgins watched her expectantly as she spoke into the receiver, both wincing as she raised her voice to a panicked shout and straining to hear as her face paled and eyes widened.

With a defeated sigh, Cam hung up the phone and looked up at them. "Houston, we have a problem."

* * *

><p>"So let me get this straight." Angela rubbed her fingers to her temples. "He gets out of doing jail time by going into WITSEC claiming he will testify in court against one of the biggest crime families and they <em>lose<em> him? He manages to get off the grid? And further more, we can't touch him because they still _need_ him?" Oh, she was more than angry, she was absolutely livid.

"That about sums it up." Cam told her. "Hey, I don't like it either."

"What about Booth? Are we going to tell him?" Angela asked her.

"We have to." Hodgins answered instead. "They are all in danger. He has to be able to protect himself and his family."

"I agree." Cam nodded. "Let's just hope he doesn't go off the rails."

She looked back at the screen again; at what the files revealed or rather what they didn't Damnit! She thought they had their man but as it turns out he was only the marionette on the end of a string...a string that was being puppeteered by someone far more lethal...someone they thought was safely tucked away behind bars; former FBI agent and cronie of the Romero crime family, Jamie Kenton.

The case had happened before she joined the Jeffersonian but she had been given a few details on it; the most important being Kenton had held Dr. Brennan hostage and was about to kill her before Booth arrived in the nick of time straight out of a hospital bed to save her. She didn't even know how to brace herself for the shit storm that was looming on the horizon.

* * *

><p>"I heard your recording for me, baby." He whispered to her, kissing her brow before he sat down next to her in the hard plastic chair. "And you know what? I refuse to believe those are the last words I'll ever hear from you. You're going to wake up and you're going to tell me those things yourself. I have faith in you...in us. So please, Bones...you have to come back to me...to Lauren...to the beautiful life we're building together."<p>

He squeezed her hand and rested his head on the side of the mattress near her head. The position was uncomfortable but he didn't care. It was the closest he could get to her without joining her on the bed.

Booth felt his eyes begin to droop close with the constant rhythmic beating of the heart monitors. He was exhausted; physically, mentally and emotionally. Yet here he sat, his hand entwined with hers tightly as if she would awaken by his sheer force of will and flash those cerulean blues at him. The doctor had made his rounds an hour ago and assured him that she was doing as well as was expected considering the circumstances and it was a miracle that she had survived this long.

He hated that the doctor looked at him with more sympathy than optimism...hated that he had to sit here and watch her slowly slip away from him and there was nothing he could do about it. She was still in a medically induced coma and she would would stay that way for another forty eight hours before they weaned her off the sedative keeping her so deeply under...so far away from him.

"How is she?"

The familiar voice took a while to register but when it did, he stiffened and looked up.

"_Hannah_?"

There stood his ex-girlfriend looking contrite as she stood in the doorway watching him. Booth sat up, stunned.

"What are you _doing_ here?" He asked as he raked his fingers through his disheveled hair.

"I came as soon as I heard." She replied walking into the room, her eyes darting toward the woman in the bed barely clinging to life. "It was all over the news here in the city."

"I meant what are you doing in D.C.?" Booth sounded harsher than he intended but he really was not in the mood to have a conversation with his ex right now.

"I thought that would be obvious...I came for you." Hannah smiled sadly as she approached him. "You look like hell, Seeley." Her fingers reached out to touch his hair but he ducked away from her. She pulled her hand back, letting it fall to her side. "Have you been here since it happened?"

He snorted. He _felt_ like hell. Hannah coming in from whatever hellhole she was staying in did not make matters any better.

"Yeah." He answered her. "I haven't left."

They would have to drag him kicking and screaming out of the hospital.

"Look, it's not exactly the right time for this Hannah...nor the right place." Booth looked nervously at Bones for any sign that she could hear them. He hoped not. He knew Bones had felt insecure about his former relationship with Hannah even though he had told her what he and Hannah had was nothing compared to what they had.

"Let's go somewhere else then." She suggested. "We could go back you your place, you could shower, shave..." Hannah let her voice trail off suggestively and she moved to touch him again but this time he shot out of his chair causing it to tumble backwards; clanging on the floor.

"Jesus Christ!" He nearly shouted. "What is _wrong_ with you?"

He bent over to pick up the chair and righted it back to where it was. Bones never moved, never even flinched. The heart monitors and the intubation machine kept steadily on as if nothing ever happened.

Hannah flinched at his reaction; no longer as sure of herself as she was when she first walked in the room. "I'm sorry. I just missed you." She looked away towards Brennan and frowned. "Will she be okay?"

"That's what we're praying for." Booth said as he watched the steady rise and fall of Brennan's chest.

He felt uncomfortable and awkward. He did not want Hannah here, invading the sanctity of Brennan's room with her baggage of newly realized regret. He didn't need it and he sure as hell didn't want it.

"They say she was shot in the chest...and she was pregnant." She looked around the room. "Where is the father? Shouldn't he be the one keeping vigil by her bedside."

This was a side of Hannah, he had never seen before. She was being territorial about him and he didn't like it...not when they were over...not when he knew what they had was never real in the first place. Everyone had assumed that his anger when they broke up had been aimed at Hannah and all women in general but the truth was he had been angry at himself for letting things get so out of hand in the first place.

He may as well let the cat out of the bag. It's not like it was a secret or anything and he'd rather she find out from him than someone else. He owed her at least that much.

"_I_ am the father." He announced.

Hannah's whole body drew back in surprise before she whistled low and long. "Wow." She said shaking her head trying to wrap her mind around what he just told her. "I never thought she would actually go through with it but I guess I was wrong."

Booth was expecting anger, tears maybe...but definitely not acceptance. And what did she mean by go through with it?

"Go through with what?" He asked in thorough confusion.

"She told me about the sperm donation you made a few years back. I just assumed based on what she told me that she would never use it."

"Hannah." Booth looked at her sympathetically and shoved his hands in his pockets. "She didn't use my donation. We did things the old fashioned way."

There was the spark of anger, he was waiting for. If eyes could burn with a look, he would be on fire.

"You didn't even wait for my side of the bed to get cold, did you?"

He flinched at the hurt in her tone. "We broke up, Hannah. It's not like I cheated on you."

"I told you before I left that it wasn't over between us and I meant that. I always intended to come back." She looked at Brennan and winced. "So are you like a couple now?" Her voice broke on what was meant to be a scathing remark.

He wanted to tell her he had never wanted her to come back but he couldn't be that cruel.

"Look, Hannah. I don't want to have this conversation here." He started walking towards the door, motioning for her to follow. "There are some things I need to tell you...things you need to hear so there are no misunderstandings."

With steaming cups of coffee in hand, they managed to find a quiet corner of the cafeteria. Booth's leg shook up and down; an attempt to release the nervous energy thrumming through him. Hannah's expression was calculating now. She was pooling her resources, searching for an angle to make things swing her way. He had to tell her it was futile. She wouldn't find one.

They each watched the other in awkward silence as they sipped their drinks. The bustling of life went on around them; glasses clanked, forks scraped on plates, chairs skidded on the floor, some laughed, some cried, some sat just as silent in quiet contemplation as they robotically ate what was placed in front of them.

"Hannah..." He started with a sigh then stopped.

While Booth was trying to conjure the right words to say, Hannah was the one who broke the verbal stalemate.

"You never answered my question." She was resolved to make it difficult for him. "Are you with her or are you just the baby daddy?"

Booth blew out a breath. He had never seen this side of Hannah. He thought of that old saying...how did it go? Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. He was prepared to give her some lenience but he only bent so far.

"I understand that you're angry but you have no right to diminish what Bones and I have by throwing out crude judgements about our relationship."

"You told me she rejected you Seeley...that anything you felt for her was done...that you were with me all the way." Her tone was accusatory. "And now I find out you're with _her_? What happened? You said I don't understand so make me."

Booth leaned forward, his elbows resting on the table. "Hannah, when we met, I was in a dark place...still reeling from Bone's rejection, the gravedigger trial...my own second thoughts of being in the Army again. And you were there and you were bright and funny and sexy and you made me feel good...made me feel wanted. I needed that and you gave it to me." He paused tp gather his thoughts and was thankful she didn't interrupt him. "When I came back from Afghanistan, I never in a million years ever thought you would follow me...I honestly thought it was over. But you _did_ follow me."

"So why didn't you say anything then?"

He knew he should have but after many hours of thinking and several long conversations with Sweets, he had figured out the answer...maybe he had always known.

"I wanted to _at first_...but I was so happy you were there. It meant I didn't have to spend my nights alone thinking of all that could have been. It was wrong of me but I clung to the security of you...it made seeing Bones on a daily basis less painful knowing I was coming home to you. I did truly care about you, Hannah. Don't think I didn't."

"You cared about me." She said flatly, her mouth settling into a think line. "Seeley you told me you _loved_ me. You asked me to _marry_ you for God's sake! Are you saying that was all a lie? Because if it was, you should win an academy award. It was _that_ believable."

Shame colored his features but he came this far, he may as well see it through. "I thought I did. Then when Temperance made her confession to me during the Lauren Eames case, I realized then that I was just fooling myself. I'd been in love with her for years and I never truly stopped even though I tried to."

"But you told me I had nothing to worry about! You _proposed_ to me after that."

Booth cleared his throat trying to dislodge the lump that had formed there. "You accused me that night of not hearing you all those time when you said you weren't the marrying type. The truth is, Hannah, I _was_ listening. I _did_ hear you."

Hannah looked stunned. "What...what are you saying?"

"I'm saying I _knew_...subconsciously I _knew_ you would turn me down. Deep down I think I wanted you to. Sweets was goading me...telling me I needed to prove my commitment and I just snapped...bought the ring on a lark, not really thinking about the consequences to such an action. After I bought it, I felt such a relief because in _here_." He patted his heart. "I knew it would be the easiest way to end things."

"Make it look like it was _my_ fault you mean...like_ I_ was the one that broke _your_ heart."

"I'm not proud of what I did. It went against everything I was raised to believe in."

"What would you have done if I said yes?"

He had thought about that too. "I would have eventually ended it. To marry you...commit myself that in in a house of God...well, it would have been a lie."

Hannah sat back in her seat. She didn't know whether to throw her coffee in his face or cry.

"I truly am sorry, Hannah."

Booth was exhausted now but he felt relieved that he had finally come clean. There was no way to soften the blow but he had spent so much time lying to her in the past, she deserved the truth.

He brought his hands up to scrub his eyes. Hannah's eyes narrowed as she stared at his fingers and began to shake her head.

"I don't _fucking_ believe this." She said enunciating each word in anger. "I don't know why I didn't notice it before."

"What?" He brought his hands back down to the table.

She nodded her head in the direction of his hand. "What_ is_ it with you and women that don't believe in marriage? I just can't believe you asked her...or that she actually said yes." she shook her head disgusted.

Booth studied the band of gold on his finger, watching it glint under the fluorescent lights, a soft, nostalgic smile crossing his features.

"Actually, she asked me."


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: Okay so a few of you may had taken issue with the way I portrayed Hannah and Booth in the previous chapter but in my defense, I never liked Hannah and considered her the proverbial homewrecker. So , I took creative license and put my own spin on the events as they unfolded last season. But really, isn't that what fanfiction is supposed to be about?

Keeping that in mind, Bones may be OOC in this chapter…blame it on her pregnancy hormones or the fact that she is evolved to the point of self-realization and is attempting to make up for lost time. Flashback alert.

Enjoy!

* * *

><p><em>June, 2011<em>

_Booth was starting to get concerned. Bones was acting odd lately...more so than usual. She blamed it on the pregnancy hormones and granted it had taken awhile for him to get used to her breaking down into tears at crime scenes, he couldn't help but think this was something else. Even Angela was giving him odd looks lately. Like she knew something he didn't._

_Was she having second thoughts about their relationship...about raising their child together? Should he begin to panic that he would show up at her apartment and her bags would be packed for some Godforsaken part of the world? _

_Technically they didn't even live together, although he had just as much stuff at her place as she did at his. He had been planning on correcting that soon. They needed a place that was theirs. Now he wasn't so sure it was a possibility._

_His phone buzzed in his pocket. Checking the screen, he smiled when he noted the caller was the object of his thoughts._

"_Hey Bones. I was just thinking about you." _

"_I suppose it's very fortuitous that I called then." He could hear her smile._

"_Yeah." He agreed. "Listen, I…there is something..."_

"_Can you meet me at the Smithsonian in an hour?" She interrupted him. "I have something I would like to discuss with you."_

_And here it was. His stomach clenched. He forced himself not to think the worst...that Bones had changed. Unfortunately, he knew that history had a way of repeating itself._

"_Um...sure." He checked his watch. "An hour. Wait...won't they be closed then?"_

_She chuckled into the phone. "Not for patrons like me that donate a small fortune annually."_

"_Right." He laughed nervously. His tie suddenly felt like it was strangling him. "I forgot about that."_

"_So, I'll see you then?" _

"_Yeah...I'll be there."_

_He showed up early unable to sit around his office and think anymore. His hands were shoved in his pockets and he was staring at the looming glass doors in front of him when he felt her presence behind him._

"_You're early." She whispered in his ear behind him._

_Booth turned around and his breath caught. She became even more beautiful every time he laid eyes on her. Her face glowed and he was proud that it was their baby...the life they created growing inside of her that caused that._

"_I couldn't wait to see you." He responded, giving her a quick kiss on the lips. "Shall we?" He asked her opening the door for her._

_Their foot steps echoed down the large empty corridors. Surrounded by priceless art, Booth knew he should have been interested in, at least, offering the pieces more than a passing glance but his gaze never wavered from the woman that held his arm beside him._

_She walked with a purpose but he sensed an underlying nervousness in her demeanor and he couldn't ignore the red flags that were being waved in front of him._

"_Are we here about a case?" He asked with curiosity._

_She shook her head. "No."_

_Okay, so she wasn't going to elaborate. Now he knew something was really off. Bones always explained things; ad nauseum._

_Still silent, she led them to a mythology exhibit that focused on the ancient Greeks and the Celtics._

_Once inside the room, she wrung her hands together, darting from statue to statue regaling him with a cacophony of information, facts and figures about the Greeks, The Celts and their belief systems._

_His brows drew together in concern but he let her lead him, knowing..._hoping_ eventually she would get to the point. _

"_Did you know that marriage in ancient Greece symbolized love, mutual respect, equality and sacrifice?"_

_Completely shocked that she mentioned the "M" word, his brows raised to his hairline and he could do nothing but shake his head._

"_Uh…no actually, I didn't."_

_She nodded fervently, a broad smile lighting her face. "Oh yes. And that the Celts considered women equal to men; free to be allowed to choose their husbands and able to retain property rights within the marriage. For instance, Boadicea..."_

"_Bones..." He had to interrupt now._

_She went on as if she never heard him. "They called her the warrior queen and..."_

_Booth gently held her shoulder. "Temperance. Stop." She looked up at him confused. "What are you doing, Bones?"_

_Her face fell and Booth felt immediate remorse. "I'm sorry." She turned away from him, hugging herself. "I'm doing this all wrong."_

"_Maybe if you tell me what all of _this_ is, I can help you?"_

_She turned to face him, frowning. "Angela said that I should do this my way...a way that was exclusive to me but I don't even know what _that _is. I never even thought I would ever do this." She sat on one of the exhibit chairs and buried her face in her hands. "Now I completely screwed it away."_

_Booth smiled tenderly and bit down on his lip to keep from correcting her. He knelt down in front of her, taking her hands in his._

"_Bones, you don't need all of this...this hoopla to get across whatever you want to say. Just be honest with me." He wanted to break something but he fought hard to be gentle. "Are you planning on leaving to Greece and or Ireland to study ancient cultures and this is your way of softening the blow?"_

_Her face registered shock. "What? No!" She looked up through the ceiling and laughed through her tears. Fumbling in her bag, she pulled out a small box with shaking hands and held it in her open hand for him to see. "I'm trying to ask you to marry me and I'm obviously not doing a very good job of it." _

_Booth was reeling at the confession. What the hell could have happened to change her mind from a belief she held onto for so long?_

"_Look, if this has anything to do with what Sweets said last week about compromise..." He started but immediately stopped at her horrified expression. _

"_Is that what you think? Do you really think I'd give up years of deep rooted fears because of what Sweets had to say?"_

_Wait…did she say "fears"? Not deep rooted _beliefs_ but _fears_?_

"_Honestly, I don't know what to think." He said feeling instantly guilty for his outburst. "For years, all I ever heard from you was marriage was an antiquated ritual, completely unnecessary and blah, blah, blah and now you're telling me this. Why?"_

"_Because I love you, you idiot!" She shouted at him. "All those times I told you how I felt about marriage was a lie that I told myself because I never thought I would ever have it. It's easier not to mourn something if you pretend you never wanted it in the first place. Now after all these years of denying myself, of denying us and finally..._finally_ having it...I want more. Maybe I didn't look at the evidence closely enough but I thought you did too."_

_She dropped the box into his open hand. "And for the record I am quite certain I never said blah, blah, blah."_

_She swiftly stood and walked a few feet away to stare at a painting on the wall._

_Booth's grip tightened around the small jewelry box in his hand and closed his eyes. He was completely dumbfounded. He couldn't even move. How could he have been so wrong? He was such an idiot. He felt his own tears then. This was his _dream_. The one that he never even dared to hope would happen. _

_He walked up behind her, placed his hands on her shoulders and kissed her on the top of her head. Her back stiffened beneath his touch._

"_I do want more. Since I met you, I _always_ wanted more." He whispered as he turned her around to face him and cupped her cheek tenderly. "Ask me again." He demanded softly, his chocolate brown eyes boring into her blue ones, silently begging for her to see the absolute certainty in his gaze._

_Covering her mouth with her hand, she laughed through a sob. "Technically, I never asked you the first time."_

"_Humor me." He placed the box back in her hands._

"_I'm not getting down on one knee." She warned him._

_He smiled. "It's okay...I'll just picture it that way in my head."_

_Blowing out a trembling breath, she nodded. Her blue eyes looked up at him, searing in their intensity. He didn't even feel weird that he wasn't the one asking her. This way was just so _them_ and it was perfect._

"_The way I was forced to grow up led me to the conclusion that not even a blood bond is enough to bind you to a person. I never before believed in marriage or that it could have any true permanent meaning until I met you. I love you Booth. Will you marry me?"_

_Before he answered, he leaned towards her, capturing her lips with his in a tender kiss._

"_It would be my honor to be your husband." He replied huskily._

_Hours later when he was sated from the many rounds of "celebrations" they had, Booth lay in bed admiring the heavy weight of the gold Claddagh ring on his left hand. He was still tingling down to his very toes with happiness._

_He felt a shift in the mattress beside him. A hand played with the tufts of hair at the back of his neck. _

"_I still can't believe this is real." He whispered as he turned over on his back so she could rest her head on his bare chest._

"_The antique jeweler assured me that it was. Should I bring it to a third party appraiser to make sure?" _

_Booth laughed softly as he played with her hair. "Not the ring. This…_us_…we're finally here."_

_Brennan curled further into his body. "I'm sorry it took so long."_

_He shook his head. "No, Bones. It took _exactly_ the right amount of time. We needed to learn more about ourselves and each other…we needed to grow. I don't know if we would have made it this far if we didn't."_

"_You are probably correct in that assumption." She agreed thoughtfully._

"_There's only one thing missing." He said as he swung his legs over the side of the bed and made his way over to his dresser._

_Brennan sat up, bewildered as he began to fumble through the drawer. _

"_Aha…got it!" He jumped on the bed and crawled over to her with a predatory smile on his face until he was right in front of her. The humor suddenly gone from his face, he looked at her seriously now. "Open your hand."_

_She cocked her head at him in confusion but did as he asked her. In her open palm he placed a small wooden box._

"_What's this?" She asked, tracing her fingers along the exterior seam._

"_Go ahead." He prompted her anxiously. "Open it."_

_Brennan's breath hitched as she fumbled with the top of the box and opened it to reveal a small antique diamond ring in an intricate gold band setting._

"_Is this what I think it is?" She pulled the ring out of the box, her eyes squinting in the dark to examine it. _

_Booth reached over to the bedside lamp and clicked it on so she could see it better._

"_It was my grandmother's engagement ring." He explained. "Now it's yours."_

_She gave him a dubious look. "You never gave this to Hannah?" She questioned._

"_No Bones." He grimaced trying to find the right way to put his thoughts into words. He hated that they had to discuss Hannah, here in their bed especially now of all times but it had to be done. He had to make her understand. _

"_Pops gave me this ring after he met you. He knew you were the one. It was _always_ meant for you. I bought Hannah's ring at a store. I didn't even know what I was doing at the time…maybe trying to prove to myself that I could get over you." He saw the remorseful look on her face and hurried to continue. "Don't be sad, Bones. You see, I lost myself for a while there and tried to become someone I wasn't. The ring I bought Hannah was a reflection of that. It never even occurred to me to give her this one."_

_He took the ring from her and held it up so it glistened under the soft glow of the lamp. "Pops loved my grandmother more than life itself. This ring is a symbol of their love and I hope will be a symbol of ours. I held onto this ring because even when things looked irreparable I always had faith that maybe someday…" He stopped suddenly and brought the ring to the tip of her finger and looked at her right in the eyes. "Temperance Brennan, will you marry me?"_

"_I thought we had already agreed…"_

_Booth smiled. "Just answer the question. Bones." _

_She leaned forward, her breath a whisper in his ear making him shiver with delight. "Yes, Booth. I will marry you."_

_He slid the ring home._

_A perfect fit._

Present Day

"Seeley…Seeley are you listening to me?"

Booth's entry to the present was a shock to his system. He blinked rapidly, trying to focus on the blonde sitting across from him and rubbed at his eyes with the palms of his hands.

"Sorry, sorry. I haven't gotten much sleep in the past couple of days."

Hannah looked at the man she once loved…_still_ loved and tried to process the information he told her.

"I said I'm surprised I never read anything about the wedding."

"Yeah well, Bones publicist was itching to make a big press release but Bones nipped it. We were both afraid that if the public knew our connection went beyond a working relationship, someone could use her to get to me." He looked away from Hannah, feeling that familiar burning rising to his throat threatening another onslaught of raw emotion. "Turns out that's exactly what happened anyway. Some irony, huh?" He asked bitterly.

If she were honest with herself, she always saw the depth of feeling the two had for each other, as much as she tried to will it away.

Hannah's expression softened. She liked Temperance. She really did. They had been friends once and given the nature of her work, she didn't have many of those. To the anthropologist's credit, she never tried to get in the middle of their relationship and even tried to help it where she could. No, Temperance wasn't the one to blame here and maybe not even Seeley. It was just a fucked up situation that she ended up caught in the middle of.

She didn't know where her sense of good will was coming from. Maybe because, her friend was on the verge of death and her ex-lover looked like he wasn't far behind her.

Hannah reached over the table and squeezed Booth's hand before she stood up. There was nothing left for her here…perhaps there never was. She saw that now.

"She'll be okay, Seeley, you'll see. Temperance is stubborn as an ox. Not much can keep her down for long. Just have faith in her, okay?"

He looked down and nodded before returning an apologetic gaze to her.

"I'm sorry Hannah. I really am."

"Me too."

She hefted her messenger bag over her shoulder and took a few steps before she turned around; a thoughtful expression on her face. "You're lucky it's Temperance who has your heart. If it were anyone else, I wouldn't be walking away so easily." She smiled sadly at him. "Goodbye. Seeley."

"Goodbye Hannah."


	11. Chapter 11

Angela stopped short when she entered the cafeteria looking for Booth. She was seeing things. She had to be. That blonde woman standing over Booth at one of the tables could not be Hannah, could it? What was she doing here? Now of all times.

Angela warily watched her as the blonde, now confirmed as Hannah, turned and walked in her direction. She wondered if she should pretend she didn't see her. But the decision was taken from her hands when Hannah approached her first.

"Angela, it's good to see you." Hannah tried to smile and hugged the artist.

"Hannah." Angela was surprised by Hannah's enthusiasm and awkwardly returned the embrace after a moment of hesitation brought on by surprise. "I have to say, I'm surprised to see you."

Hannah's smile was uncomfortable and her eyes flitted across the room to where Booth sat mulling over his coffee. "Yeah, that seems to be going around."

Suddenly, Angela knew…she knew what Hannah was doing here and part of her felt angry that she would dump this on Booth, now of all times and part of her felt sad for the young woman standing before her.

"You can back for him." Angela stated quietly, more to herself than to Hannah.

Hannah blinked in surprise. "I'm that transparent, huh?"

"No, sweetie, not at all." Angela said sympathetically, sorry that she had spoken the thought out loud. "I'm an artist. Reading facial expressions is what I do."

Hannah bit back a sob. "I don't know why I am so shocked. I mean I've been gone a year and a half. Seeley is a great guy, you know. What did I expect?"

She had promised herself she would not cry, at least not until she was firmly ensconced back in her hotel room with a glass of Scotch…no make that a bottle. She would have to arrange for another night's stay. After all, she thought she would be spending the night with Seeley.

Angela stayed silent. She knew what Hannah expected and she also knew that she never anticipated Brennan's change of heart or that Booth would so readily take her in the fold of his arms after her rejection of him. Yes, she could see this threw the normally composed journalist for a loop.

If there weren't more pressing matters to attend, Angela might have asked her if she wanted to talk about it over a cup of coffee or a few drinks. She bit her bottom lip trying to figure out the best way to end this very awkward conversation.

"Um Hannah, I don't mean to be rude and I really would like to stay and talk to you…"

"But it's a bad time." Hannah said with understanding.

"Exactly…"Angela said absently with a puckered brow think of how she was going to tell Booth without having him fly of the rails. "I have to tell Booth something and he's not going to like it."

"No problem." Hannah forced a smile. "I wouldn't want to put you in a bad position anyway. Temperance is your best friend. Your loyalty lies with her."

Yes it did. She could admit to herself now that she didn't want to like Hannah at first. She resented Booth for forcing her on all of them as if he expected them to accept her with open arms. He shoved their relationship in their faces and turned a blind eye to how it affected Brennan. As she had come to genuinely like her, she couldn't deny that she felt relief when she left.

"My friendship was not disingenuous, Hannah. I really did like you." Angela felt she had to say the words to her.

"I know." Hannah gave a sad smile. "You just didn't like me for Booth." At Angela's startled expression, she continued. "I'm a journalist." She shrugged. "Reading facial expressions is what I do."

* * *

><p>Booth was massaging out the kink in the back of his neck when he saw a shadow appear over the edge of the table. He looked up slowly to see Angela watching him with sympathy in her brown eyed gaze before she sat down across from him in the seat Hannah had just vacated.<p>

"I just ran into Hannah." She said softly. "Are you okay?"

He took a moment to think about it. "Yeah, I think I am." He said surprised that it really was the truth. "I mean it felt good to finally release the burden of the truth. In the back of my head, I always felt she would come back and I would have to tell her. And she seemed to be okay with it, I think. Didn't she?"

"Yeah…she did. And even if she isn't okay with it right now, she will be. Girls like Hannah always end up back on their feet."

"Good." He nodded, thankful for the confirmation. "That's good."

"Umm, Booth. " Angela said nervously as she shifted in her seat. "There is a reason why I came looking for you."

"You found the information on the drive." He knew that she was in the lab working on it when she wasn't in the hospital.

When she gave a nod, Booth should have felt elated but he didn't. He felt a shift in the atmosphere; a tension that wasn't there before and it was emanating from the person in front of him.

"And?" He prompted.

"And…Carson wasn't working alone." Her voice dropped a few levels and her gaze locked with his as if she could hold him steady with her eyes. "Actually, he was only the hired help."

It was Booth's turn to tense up. His back straightened and his fingers gripped the sides of the table.

"Who was he working for?"

Angela flinched at the deadly tone in his voice.

"You're not going to like it."

"Who, Angela?"

"Jamie Kenton."

BAM! Booth's fist slammed so hard on the table, the silverware went flying off. Other patrons stopped and stared.

"SONOFABITCH!"

* * *

><p>"Would someone <em>please<em> explain to me how the fuck this happened?" Booth paced back and forth in front of Angela and Cam. "How is a guy that's spending a lifetime in prison arrange and pay for hits?"

Angela was glad she dragged Booth out of the cafeteria and called Cam before she explained further. The next bomb they were about to drop was going to send him over the edge. She looked beseechingly at Cam telling her with her eyes that she wasn't going to touch this one.

Why not? Cam thought. I've been the bringer of bad news for days.

"He's not _in_ prison, Booth."

Booth turned so swiftly shooting daggers from his eyes that Cam took a defensive step back.

"What? Say that again because_ I know_ I heard you wrong."

"He cut a deal with for the WITSEC Progam but he missed his last appointed check in with them three months ago."

His foot connected violently with a chair sending it crashing into a wall. "I'm sorry." He said pulling at his hair. "It's just…aaarrrggg!" He scrubbed his face with his hands trying to steady his temper. It wasn't working. How was it that no one bothered to inform him of the deal. He was the arresting agent for Christsakes.

"We know, big guy, we know." Angela told him.

"I already sent a copy of the report along with the file Angela recovered to Cullen." Cam cut in trying to get back to the case and cut through the churning emotions that filled the room. "He wants to see you in his office."

For just a moment a look of fear entered Booth's eyes. "No. I am not taking one step out of this hospital. He can come here if he wants to speak to me."

Cam nodded. She had a feeling he wouldn't. She even told as much to Cullen. "I'll call him and let him know."

"You do that. In the meantime I have a few more questions for Carson." Booth went for the door but Cam stepped in front of him preventing his departure.

"Cullen also wanted you to hold off your involvement in anything having to do with the case until he spoke to you."

"_Oh come on_! Why would he do that?" His tone grew suspicious. "There's something else isn't there…something you haven't told me yet."

"There is." Cam confirmed without blinking an eye. "The list of hits and their payoffs had two initials on it that were not yet accomplished…so to speak. We believe they were yours and Dr. Brennan's. You see, Booth, regardless of what happened at the cabin, you _and_ Dr. Brennan were targeted to die."

Now it began to make sense why Cullen wanted to see him, why he didn't want him to interview Carson. "Cullen's pulling me from the case, isn't he?"

"I'm sorry Booth." Cam was apologetic but she could do no less than look him in the eye.

His lips pressed together in a thin line of resolve and he nodded his head only once as he fixed her with a steely glare. "Fine. When Cullen comes, come get me. I'll be in NICU with my daughter."

Booth shouldered past Cam and made a direct line for the elevator bank trying to control his harsh breathing. His fingers hovered over the floor buttons and was tempted to just say screw it and hit the one for Carson's floor to interview him anyway. Instead he pressed the button for the NICU floor knowing the sight of his thriving daughter would help calm him down more than seeing Bones broken and barely alive in her hospital bed would.

He was right. Holding his daughter in his arms, feeding her the bottle and letting her sweet baby scent wash over him proved cathartic. That was until he felt eyes watching him. He looked up to see Cullen watching him with sympathy beyond the glass.

Sighing, he placed a kiss on his daughter's forehead and handed her over to the nurse who took her a placed her back into the crib. Booth took off his scrubs, dumped them in the hamper, straightened his shoulders and went through the doors to meet with his boss.

Cullen placed a comforting grip on Booth's arm. "I meant to make it down here sooner but things are…" his brow furrowed before he shook his head, choosing not to finish out the sentence. " How are they?"

Booth's reappearing anger suddenly deflated in the wake of Cullen's concern.

"Lauren." He nodded towards the NICU room. "is doing real well. Bones…Temperance…" he forced himself to keep a calm steady voice. "Her condition is pretty serious but she is holding her own for now."

Cullen nodded with a frown. "C'mon. Let's take a walk."

As they walked slowly down the corridor Cullen sighed heavily. "It's never easy is it? Watching someone you love be so close to death and knowing there isn't a damn thing you can do about it."

His voice was bitter and Booth knew he was reflecting on the death of his own daughter, Amy that had died from cancer a few years back.

"No, Sir." Booth agreed quietly. "It's not."

"I know you want in on this case Booth for exactly that reason. To do something…anything. But I also know that's the exact reason why you shouldn't be and you know that too."

"You're afraid it will ruin the integrity of the case because I am so close to the victim." Booth shuddered wanting to kick himself for referring to Bones as a victim. She wasn't a victim. She was his wife.

"Also because _you_ are a victim…or would have been had Carson fulfilled his list."

Booth nodded his acceptance of this. He wanted in on getting Kenton so bad, he could taste it but better sense prevailed. He wanted nothing to get in the way of the sonofabich going to prison for a very long time.

"Why did no one ever tell me about Jamie cutting a deal?"

Cullen blew out a defeated breath. "Trust me I wasn't too happy about it either."

Booth stopped short in his tracks. "Wait a minute. You mean you didn't know about it?"

"Kenton wouldn't have been in WITSEC at all if I had known about it." He bit out angrily but reeled in his ire quickly. "Believe me, I caused heads to roll down at the US Marshalls Department after Dr. Saroyan called me. Kenton _was_ one of my men after all."

"Why would they go behind your back?"

Cullen made a face. "Unfortunately they didn't see it that way. When Kenton came to them with the deal, they saw it as a way to get more arrests under their belt. They went straight over my head right to the Director." He shook his head. "I had words with him too."

Booth winced. He had only met the Director of the FBI a handful of times and knew him to be a no nonsense intimidaitng man.

"Ouch."

"Agent Booth, you and Dr. Brennan were there for my daughter and me during a very difficult time. I have _not_ nor will I _ever_ forget that. So a little tongue lashing from my boss for calling him out on his deceit is a price well worth paying."

"Thank you, Sir." Booth felt humbled by his boss's defense of them. "So what happens now? Have you reassigned a new agent?"

Cullen nodded. "I have. And before you go off the rails, the agent I assigned cares a lot about the case, though he isn't as personally invested as you are."

"But is he _good_?" That was all Booth cared about.

"Not as good as you but he's damn good and he's flying in from another field office. He should be here later today to report to me. You and the squints." He grinned at the term. "will give him everything he needs, files, reports, the works."

Booth wondered why this other agent cared about the case so much. Did he know him personally?

"So who's the new agent?"

Cullen looked at him squarely. "Special Agent Timothy Suliivan."


	12. Chapter 12

Agent Tim Sullivan was chewing on the last bite of his spare ribs when the phone on his desk rang. Licking his fingers of the spicy Texan barbecue sauce off his fingers, he picked up the phone holding it between his ear and shoulder as he reached to grab a napkin from the take-out bag.

"Sullivan." He answered jovially, mid chew.

"Am I disturbing your lunch, Agent?"

Tim Sullivan quickly finished swallowing and wiped the evidence of his lunch from his face as if the caller on the other end could see the reddish brown sauce on the corner of his lip. He would know the authoritative voice of Deputy Director Sam Cullen anywhere.

"Uh...No, sir." He said as he shoved the eaten spare rib bones into the grease stained white paper bag.

"Good. I'll get right to the point then. You wanted an in back in DC, well you got it. We have a situation here that requires your presence."

Sully felt the first surge of optimism he had since he came back to the F.B.I. after his not so fulfilling sail around the warm waters of the Caribbean. He had wanted to work back in DC but both Hacker and Cullen had other ideas, wanting him to prove himself again and assigned him to the field office in Dallas. He wondered what happened that would cause Cullen to call him back out of the blue.

He had a decent solve rate but nothing that would cause Deputy Director Cullen's notice.

"A situation, Sir?"

"You remember Jamie Kenton?" Cullen asked, his voice filled with a quiet rage when he spoke the name.

How could he forget? Everyone knew Kenton. He was a murderer and a turncoat _and_ he had also been Sully's partner at one time for a very brief period. But last he heard, the bastard was in prison.

"Of course."

"Excellent. You need to help us find him."

"Find him?" He chuckled. "I didn't know he was lost."

His attempt at a joke went flat. He didn't have to see Cullen's face to know that the man's lips formed a thin line. No, he didn't find that remark funny at all.

"This is not a joke, Agent Sullivan. Kenton is responsible for the deaths of over ten highly influential individuals not to mention the attempted murders of a fellow FBI agent and an esteemed and more importantly _pregnant_ FBI consultant."

This was very serious, indeed. Sully felt the humor within him dissolve and a horrible feeling made his gut clench tightly as Cullen went on to explain Kenton's involvement and escape from Witness Protection only to result in hiring a hit man to carry out murders on his behalf. The hit man was captured and placed under guard in the hospital after an altercation resulting in shots fired but Kenton was still loose. It was only after some quick work by the Jeffersonian Institute that they had discovered Kenton's involvement.

He didn't want to tip his own apple cart but something wasn't adding up. If the Jeffersonian was already involved then wouldn't Booth be lead agent on the case?

"Sir, I'm grateful that you need my assistance but why me? I know Booth and his merry band of squints are perfectly capable of carrying out the assignment."

All Sully heard was a deep sigh on the other end. His spare ribs felt heavy in his stomach. Something was very off.

"Booth was on the case but I am pulling him off and you are the only one I know that is able to work with the _merry band of squints_ as you so affectionately call them and Kenton was your partner at one point. You may know him better than anyone."

Well, no one actually _knew_ Kenton. If they did they would've realized long ago his loyalties did not fall on the right side of the law. Then the other comment Cullen made resonated deep within him.

"_Why_ was Booth pulled off the case?"

"He was the agent that Kenton put a hit on."

Okay, personal involvement. That made sense.

"Is he hurt? Is he okay?"

"He suffered a minor concussion. As for being _okay_, that is up to interpretation."

Sully's senses went on immediate alert. Cullen was holding something back. Something important.

"You're not telling me everything."

"Perceptive, Agent Sullivan."

"_Are_ you going to tell me?" He prodded.

"I was hoping to save it until you got here but I may as well tell you now in case you feel you cannot handle the assignment objectively. The FBI Consultant that I mentioned before is Dr. Brennan."

Tempe.

Sully felt like someone punched him in the diaphragm. All the breath left his lungs and he felt like he was gasping for air as he gripped the phone tighter in his fist.

No wonder Booth was off the case. It wasn't because Kenton had out a hit on him. It was because he had put a hit out on Temperance. Temperance, who apparently was carrying a child...Booth's child. He must be going insane right now.

"Dr. Brennan was admitted to the hospital with a gunshot wound to the chest and is currently on a respirator in a medically induced coma. We are hopeful but not optimistic at this point." Cullen continued forcing all emotion from his voice but his rage at the circumstances seeped through his clinical explanation anyway. "The infant was able to be delivered and is currently thriving so I am told. Thank God."

The phone dropped from Sully's grip, clanging unceremoniously on his desk and he fought back the bile that rose from his throat.

Temperance may die.

Kenton was a dead man.

He heard Cullen shouting his name through the receiver breaking through his shock. Numbly, he picked the phone back up.

"I'll be on the next flight out to DC." He said absently before hanging up.

Two hours later Special Agent Tim Sullivan was boarding a plane to Dulles airport.

* * *

><p>"Sully? " Booth was momentarily stunned. "I thought he was off playing the wayward sailor down in the Bahamas."<p>

The last he saw of Sully was when he waved to him from the docks as he sailed off into the sunset on a boat named after his wife; The Temperance.

"I'll give him the honors of explaining that when he gets here. But suffice it to say, he is the only one I know that can work well with the squints besides you. And we need that."

Booth knew they did. But Sully? He couldn't deny he was a great guy but he was also Bones' Ex. She had actually considered sailing around the world with him. Booth hated to admit that he couldn't help but feel insecure.

Shake it off, Booth. He's coming to help. There is no room here for a testosterone fueled pissing contest.

Bone's doctor approached them quietly and pulled him aside.

"What is it?" Booth asked suddenly panicked. "Is something wrong?"

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to alarm you." The doctor quickly apologized for giving the wrong impression. "I just wanted to inform you that we're going to begin to ween Dr. Brennan of the coma inducing anesthesia."

"_What?_ Isn't that dangerous? Didn't you put her on that so she could heal? What if she's not healthy enough for that yet?" He fired off the questions in rapid succession.

"Mr. Booth, please calm down. I understand you are under a lot of stress."

"You don't know the half of it buddy."

"We need to ween her off so we can gage how her healing is progressing. In order to get accurate test results, we need to conduct them when she is out of a coma state. We can always put her under again if she is not doing as well as we hoped."

"And the intubation?"

"We need to keep that in for now. Her lungs still are not re-inflated enough for her to breathe on her own."

Booth really wished Cam were here beside him to confirm what the doctor was telling him was accurate.

"It will be quite some time before she awakes, Mr. Booth. May I suggest you go home and get some rest? Your body is still recovering from a nasty blow to the head."

Booth was shaking his head before the doctor even finished his sentence.

"No. No way. Not gonna happen. So you can just forget it."

"It really would be in your best interests..."

"My best _interests_ would be staying here with my wife and child." Booth cut him off.

The doctor nodded. "I understand. I'll see what I can do about having a family room be available to you."

Booth nodded curtly in silent thanks.

* * *

><p>Sully went straight from the airport to the hospital. He knew he would probably catch hell from his superiors without checking in first but this was something he had to do. Because of his credentials he gained easy access into the ICU and past the security that stood diligently outside her door.<p>

He could hear the machines before he even entered the room but even the sounds of them couldn't prepare him for what he was about to see. The woman that he was in love with, even now after all this time, he was man enough to admit that he still was, looked nothing like the fiery, stubborn, smart woman he knew.

Pasting a smile on his face as if she could see him, he sat on the chair next to the fragile figure on the bed. He stayed silent at first, just watched her; searching for any signs of life besides the ones the machines were providing for her.

"You know, if you had come with me, we'd still be sitting on a remote beach somewhere drinking exotic cocktails with colorful umbrellas sticking out of them." He tried to joke. "But no, you _had_ to solve murders with Booth. It's okay, though. I get it. Speaking of Booth, I haven't seen him yet but if I know him, he'll make a bee line here as soon as he hears I'm in the building."

He leaned forward scrubbing his face with his hand as he did so and took her hand in his other one; no longer having the energy to keep up the pretense of a happy facade.

"We're going to get him Tempe and you're going to get better. Okay? That's an order."

He half expected her to awaken and tell him to go to hell, that no one gave her orders. But she didn't.

Booth stood in the doorway of her room, showing up as soon as he was informed that Sully had arrived and went straight to Bones' room. He didn't announce his presence at first; wanting to hear what Sully would reveal in these unguarded moments. Was he still carrying a torch for his wife? Was he going to try and insinuate himself in their lives? He didn't want to believe this of the other agent but the truth was Bones had feelings for him at one point and she had seriously considered going away with him when he asked her to.

Sully felt eyes on him and turned around to see Booth, more haggard than he had ever seen him, leaning against the doorway with his hands in his pockets, watching him warily. He saw Booth's eyes dart from him to Temperance and saw his jaw clench when his gaze landed on his hands interlocked with Tempe's. He immediately dropped his hold on her hand and stood up abruptly.

"We need to talk." Booth said and he gave Bones a tender look before turning his grim expression back to Sully. "Not here."

Sully nodded and followed Booth out of the room. He knew they needed to have this conversation if they were going to be working together and despite what Cullen, Hacker or anyone else said, they would be working together. He knew Booth well enough to know that he wouldn't just take a backseat in this investigation.

* * *

><p>"So, you're back." Booth said as they sat in the family room that was set up for him. It also doubled as a base of operations for now.<p>

"I'm back." He confirmed.

"When?" It was the one thing Booth wanted to know besides 'why'. "Last I heard you were sailing from port to port in search of the perfect sunset."

Sully slumped into a chair, determined to be honest. He owed Booth that, at least. "It didn't take me too long to figure out I shouldn't have left in the first place. What was supposed to be a journey of self discovery turned into me just wandering aimlessly with no one to share it with...at least not the one I wanted to. I came back last April...first to Quantico to beg for my old job back and then to see Tempe."

The vein on the side of Booth's temple started to pulsate. "She didn't tell me anything about that."

"Maybe because there was nothing to tell." Sully said defeatedly. "We went out to dinner, we caught up on each others lives, we laughed...but she also made it quite clear that she was waiting for you...to stop being angry, that you had some sort of understanding...whatever that meant." He shook his head as he recalled looking into her blue eyes, wanting nothing more than to take her back to her place and make love to her all night long like they used to. Hearing her tell him that was like having a pail of ice cold water dumped on him.

"So, I left. I was re-assigned to Dallas. Then a few months later, I get a wedding announcement in the mail with a note from Tempe saying she was sorry she did not invite me but considering the circumstances, she thought it might have been awkward to all involved. Reading it, I really couldn't disagree."

"And now?"

Sully emitted a heavy sigh. "Booth, even back then I could see there was something between you; even though you both denied it, even though you didn't physically act on it; I knew it was there. And now that you _have_...well only a fool would try to come in between that. And my mama didn't raise a fool. Now? Now, I just want to get that bastard, Kenton."

Satisfied with his answer, Booth nodded.

"Let's get to work then."


	13. Chapter 13

A/N - Thank you for the reviews so far. Please keep them coming. There is nothing better for a writer than hearing from readers.

* * *

><p>"She should be waking soon."<p>

"When? It's been so long already."

_Booth, is that you? _

"These things take time, Mr. Booth."

"So I keep hearing."

_Why do you sound so defeated? So angry? So…sad?_

An awkward chuckle. "You know Temperance…_always_ has to do things her own way."

_Dad?_

She was floating again back in that deep void of dark space. The voices drifted off far and away. She was too tired and too listless to reach for them.

Booth took up residence in the chair next to her bed. The nurses had been kind enough to replace the lumpy chair that had been there before with something more comfortable. Although he was grateful for the gesture, it was a small amenity that meant little in the grand scheme of things.

All he really wanted was for Bones to wake up. Nothing else meant much to him if that didn't happen…well nothing much with the exception of the little girl sleeping a few floors below them. Not even revenge on Kenton mattered...as much. And at this point, it was revenge that drove him; not the justice he usually preserved…the justice that had previously been one of the cornerstones of his foundation. Until now.

Though no one said anything outright, the all knew the tenure of his thoughts. It read loud and clear through the desperate determination that was set in his eyes. Secretly, they were relieved he was pulled from the case, if only to save his career.

He soothed her forehead with the pad of his thumb and traced his fingers down her cool cheek.

So pale, he thought. Still wrapped up in the embrace of the grim reaper; who was so ready to take her from him. He had already tried and nearly succeeded.

You can't have her. Not yet, he vowed silently. God willing, not for a _very_ long time.

_Hail Mary full of Grace_

_The Lord is with thee_

He recited the prayer in a fervent whisper, his head bowed as he gripped her hand, willing for some kind of a response. He'd take anything at this point.

_Blessed art thou amongst women_

_and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus._

Was her color getting better? Or was he imagining things born from intense desolation? Booth continued with the mantra hoping it was making a difference. I can believe for the both of us, Bones.

_Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners,  
>now and at the hour of our death.<br>Amen._

The feeling of weightlessness was beginning to drift away no matter how hard she tried to hold on to it. She felt metaphorically heavy now as if large anchors were holding her down in the darkness. She struggled to move…to let the voice know she could hear him…assure him in some way.

_Pain. There was so much pain. _

The memories came then, not in gentle waves lapping to the shore but in the form of an avalanche, clogging her throat, suffocating her.

Eyes sprang open as her body jackknifed upward, her hands clawing at the tubing in her throat. In an instant, Booth was there, his hands grasping her wrists with one hand while the other pulled her into an embrace.

"It's okay, baby. It's the intubation, you feel, Bones" He whispered in her ear knowing it was the tubes down her throat that reason for her reaction. "Just relax." He soothed circular motions just below the back of her neck with one had while his other hand reached over for the call button.

Her eyes were deep blue pools of panic, watching him. He knew she would have many questions that needed to be answered but all he wanted to do right now was shower her with comforting phrases until the look of terror left her face.

"I know it's scary, baby." He choked out, unable to stem the flow of tears that leaked from his eyes. "But it's going to be okay now. As long as you're here, everything is going to be okay."

He leaned her head back down on the pillow. She shook her head back and forth in panic, weakly grabbing at his shoulders, trying to resist him.

"Bones, _please_." He begged. "I don't want you to hurt yourself."

With an angry grunt, she pushed him back with surprising force and pointed to her abdomen as she tried unsuccessfully to swing her legs over the side of the bed. She emitted a strained gasp when the movement proved too painful.

Booth scrambled to get her to lie back down again. She was lucky none of the IV's pulled out of her arm.

God, he was so stupid., he thought as he finally realized what she was trying to ask.

"No Bones, Lauren is fine. She is _fine_…wonderful and healthy and all the good things that a newborn should be…she's just a little small that's all."

Booth knew her facial expressions well enough to know that she was still questioning.

"I promise, Bones. She's in NICU but she's good and probably missing her mommy, like I have been."

Her eyes closed briefly as her body slumped in relief.

* * *

><p>Booth hovered in the corner of the room, his hands fisting and unfisting as the doctor examined his wife, explaining what had happened to her and the surgeries they performed. Despite the doctor's protests, he had refused to leave the room, partially in fear that she would be unconscious again when he came back and partially because he wanted to see and hear exactly what the doctor was doing and saying even if he didn't understand half of it.<p>

She took it like the trooper she was though. Here he was worried about her being stressed out by the long convoluted dissertation the doctor was giving her about her procedures but his own anxiety started to spike at hearing it over again.

"Things look like they are progressing well, Dr. Brennan." The doctor commented breaking Booth from the dark place he was falling into. "I'm going to schedule you for more tests for confirmation, however."

Brennan looked at Booth, asking him with her eyes to speak for her.

"Uh, Doc, the intubation?" He pointed to his own throat. "When can that be removed?"

"Not until after I see those results, I'm afraid." He said apologetically.

Brennan frowned. How was she supposed to communicate freely if she couldn't speak. She made a writing motion with her hand and blinked her eyes in relief when the doctor nodded his head in understanding.

"I'll see if one of the nurses can supply you with a pad and pen." He added before leaving. "But don't over exert yourself." The doctor gave Booth a pointed look.

Brennan wanted so badly to talk. There was much she wanted to say and so many questions she wanted to ask.

What happened?

The last thing she remembered was Hacker's tense face as he yelled at her?

Did she kill Carson at his hunting domicile?

She shot him. She could almost still fell the kick pack of the pistol as the bullet burned a hole in her pocket.

He had shot her too. She had felt the impact the bullet made, remembered collapsing to the ground, hearing the sirens.

Had she prayed? She might have, she thought with a twinge of amusement. This bore further investigation when she had a moment to reflect.

She took a moment to study Booth regardless of the haze of pain she felt emanating from her whole body. The only injury she could assess was covered by a small white bandage by his hairline over his left eye. She pointed at it.

"Just a little bump on the head, Bones. It's fine. I got a thick skull, remember?" He joked, hitting his head with his knuckles.

She rolled her eyes at his attempt at humor. It was quite an experience only being to communicate with her eyes but Booth knew her so well after all these years, he had become adept at reading her facial expressions. Still she wanted that pen and paper.

Her fingers reached for the morphine drip but the movement caused her to hiss in pain over the tube in her mouth.

"I got it." He said easing her arm back down and pressed the drip for her.

She met his eyes with relief as she felt the narcotic enter her bloodstream. She hated the way it would make her feel; her mind wasn't as sharp, her movements would slur but right now it was a necessary evil.

A cheerful nurse came in the room. She placed the writing materials on the tray and wheeled it over to Brennan.

"Would you like me to put the mattress forward so you can sit up?" The nurse asked.

Brennan nodded slightly and tried to keep the pained expression off her face as the mattress crept up slowly but her finger tips gripping into the side of the bed told a different story.

She barely waited a moment after the nurse was out of the room before her fingers slid the notebook closer to her and with a tentative, unsteady grip on the pen, she began to write.

_You look tired._

Booth didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Her scribbled words were not at all what he expected. It was true though, he hadn't had a decent sleep since Cam had told him Brennan had been shot.

She glared at him when let out a small chuckle and shook his head.

_What's so funny?_

"Nothing Bones. I'll try and get some rest soon, when I know what's going on with you, okay?"

She felt guilty. She wanted to tell him to get some sleep but part of her...a selfish part of her needed him here.

_I love you. I feel the need to say that. It's been so long since I said it out loud, I think?_

Booth nodded, biting his bottom lip trying to keep a broken sob from breaking through.

"It felt like it, baby. It certainly felt like it." He gripped her hand in his and kissed the backs of her knuckles before resting it on his cheek. "God, Bones. I love you so much. I don't think I've ever been more terrified in my entire life."

She caressed his cheek briefly, an overwhelming sadness coming into her eyes, before reaching for the pad again.

_What happened?_

With brows furrowed, she thought for a second than added a few more words.

_What happened? To Carson?_

Booth hesitated after he read the scrawl. _Should_ he tell her? How much _could_ he tell her?

With a frustrated huff and a roll of the eyes, she grabbed the pad back from him and wrote furiously across the page.

_Telling me will not "over exert" me. Not telling me, will cause my stress levels to escalate thereby causing my blood pressure to raise and that will "over exert" me!_

She double underlined the words for emphasis and pushed the pad back to him

"Not fair Bones." He shook his head. Only she would demand information on the case when she was recovering from a gunshot wound that nearly killed her.

Brennan raised one eyebrow.

"In a nutshell? We got him. He'll be going away and won't see freedom until he's carried out of prison in a body bag."

_Angela was able to restore the drive?_

Booth clenched his jaw thinking of what that information had revealed…the sick plot of Jamie Kenton. He knew Sully was probably questioning Carson at this very moment about it.

"Yeah, she was able to restore it."

Brennan sensed he was holding something back. Something in his tone and his tense expression sent warning bells through her.

_What aren't you telling me?_ She wrote.

She knew him so well, he thought.

"No Bones." He shook his head emphatically. "I have to draw the line somewhere. You need to think of your health _for once_. This is not the way to do it."

Her eyes started to glisten with unshed tears.

_You're angry. At me._

Was he? He had been so worried sick over her he hadn't had time to feel anything else but now she was awake he could examine his emotions with more scrutiny. And he realized he was.

"Did you even think…?" Booth blew out a vicious breath and raked his hand through his hair trying to calm down. "No." He said more to himself than to her. "We will have this conversation, just not…just not now."

Her intense blue gaze held his...questioning him.

"You died!" Booth nearly shouted in answer to her silent communication. "Literally flatlined before my eyes."

He pressed his palms against his eyes, rubbing them...trying to rub away the memory of him begging and shouting and her...lying there so still...a continuous high pitched beeping. Booth heard the pen flow over the paper again.

When he was able to get a grip on himself and finally looked back at her, she signaled toward the paper and at the two words she wrote on it.

_I know_

"Know what Bones, what do you know."

_I know I died_


End file.
